PQ 15.2 — When am I open to taking new partners?
I’ve recently become polysaturated, for the first time in an awfully long time.
But prior to this, I’ve literally spent years being open to taking new partners — and yet doing so only fairly infrequently.
In some ways, “open to taking new partners” has been the perfect descriptor for me during those long stretches when I was only dating one person. It was all a matter of the right person showing up at the right time. Someone I really clicked with who’d work well with my life — and me with theirs. I wasn’t even really seeking so much as open. Open is such a great word for it.
But I’m busy now. Not only do I have three partners, but it’s fairly complicated:
- I’m the first woman both of my girlfriends have ever really dated.
- I’m in an open triad with my husband and one of my girlfriends.
- Neither my husband nor girlfriend has dated in a triad before. It’s all brand new to them.
- I have dated in triads a few different times, but it’s been a while.
Given all of this, I am closed to new relationships for the time being. I want to give as much care and attention as I can to the relationships I’ve currently got going on.
Will this change? And if so, when?
…I honestly don’t know.
I’m happy, the happiest I’ve been in the decade that’s passed since I first heard the word “polyamorous.”
I’m not worried about opportunities that I might be missing out on while I’m investing in the people I love.
This post is part of a series in which I answer each of the chapter-end questions in More than Two with an essay. For the entire list of questions and answers, please see this indexed list.