When “Problematic” Becomes Problematic: Identity Assumptions, Dissonance, and Confessions

a blackboard with a bunch of mathematical formulas and graphs written on it in chalk
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.

Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).

Here’s what they wrote for us today:

Finding Something Problematic Tells Me More About You

As someone who does the delicate dance between the worlds of social justice and diversity and inclusion,  » Read more

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It’s Better to Just Keep Your Promises Than to Try to Really Wow People

two toy figurines of Joker from Batman. The one on the right is small and cute and childlike. The one on the right is a wiry adult looking version of the Joker.
Image by JD Hancock / CC BY

There’s an old school of thought in business called “underpromise, overdeliver.”

Essentially, this advice says that what you should do is set customer expectations low so that you can not only meet them but exceed them. That it’s important not only to satisfy your customers but to thrill them.

It might take extra effort than simply setting up reasonable expectations and meeting them (the double think and communication required to have one internal story for employees and another external one for customers),  » Read more

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How Commonly Do Women Fake Orgasms and Why?

a disguise with a fake nose and glasses
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

One of the things you learn very early on when you study psychological research is that what people say they do and what they actually do don’t always line up. In fact, they quite frequently differ. So as a researcher (who also happens to be a woman), it’s not surprising to me that it’s not all that uncommon for women to fake orgasms at least once in their life.  » Read more

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This Yankee Needs to Find Her Yeehaw… and Soon

a closeup of an array of black and brown cowboy boots
Image by Marco Verch / CC BY

We’re stopped at a Subway in Kentucky. On our way to Georgia, to a large conference called Frolicon, due to land later that evening.

My husband, who grew up in rural Michigan, is suddenly talking like a cowboy. “Yes, ma’am, no ma’am, thank you kindly.” It’s appropriate given the context but jarring. He code switches like it’s no big deal.  » Read more

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Managing a D/s Dynamic When Your Partner Faces Mental Health Challenges

a brain in chains
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Today’s article is a guest post by Fay Creature.

Fay Creature has been practicing polyamory since 1998 and kink since 2003. She is queer – in sexuality, gender, and her approach to relationships, power exchange, and BDSM.

And check out what she wrote for Poly Land today:

Mental Health and My D/s Dynamics

I believe that BDSM can be very healing,  » Read more

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