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You Can Be Conditioned to Expect Communication to Be Full of Tricks and Traps
I grew up in a strict authoritarian household where I had very little freedom. It was a house in which you had to ask permission to have a glass of water — because after all, someone had to wash it later.
A promise to be the person who washed the glass wasn’t good enough. » Read more
Open Communication Doesn’t Magically Erase the Impact of Major Change
Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.
Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).
Here’s what they wrote for us today: » Read more
Why Don’t I Communicate More?
The Other Side of Open Communication
“You just need to have open, honest communication.”
The people who originally introduced me to polyamory explained it to me that way. It was the closest thing we had to a firm, fast rule. The one bit of instruction that was consistently provided.
In every scenario, it was said, you couldn’t go wrong with open, » Read more
Good Conversation and Good Communication Are Different Things
“I don’t know that we communicate well,” I say to him.
“This is news to me,” he replies.
“Really?”
“Really,” he says. “I love talking to you.”
“I do, too,” I say. “We have good conversations.”
“But you just…”
I sigh. “Just because we have good conversations doesn’t mean that we communicate well.” » Read more
Don’t Forget That Writing Is Ultimately a Form of Communication
Every writer has a different story of how they got into it. When they started. Why.
My own story starts in the third grade. Because for a few years prior to that point, sure, I could read and write. But I mostly did so in order to function in the world around me, » Read more
Yes, Lying Sucks, But There’s an Even Bigger Obstacle to Effective Communication
When I was a child, I was told over and over again by my mother that honesty was very important. That truth was moral and lies were immoral.
That was what she said.
And then she showed me something different: That telling the truth is important unless that truth is embarrassing or inconvenient to her. » Read more
Just Because Communication Is Direct, That Doesn’t Mean It Has to Be Harsh
A little while ago, I published a piece called “My Number One Kink Is Direct Communication.” In that essay, I talk about the reasons why I have such a distaste for playing games with people when it comes to communication. I’m not a big fan of passive-aggression, guessing games in which one person is expected to mind-read the other’s thoughts, » Read more
My Number One Kink Is Direct Communication
It’s been decades, but I still vividly remember my old elementary school. It was a brick building. Standing outside at recess, I’d often stare at those walls, fascinated by the flaws in the blocks, the cracks and places where they were uneven. I was generally a talkative kid and often very social but occasionally I’d get overwhelmed. » Read more
How to Fail at Communication Before You Say a Single Word
Hi Page,
I love the blog! Been reading it for a while. I’ve been learning more about polyamory the last few years, and I’ve realised that I’m probably polyamorous. Trouble is I’m in a relationship with a woman who is very monogamous. I would love to be able to explore all the love I feel, » Read more
PQ 7.8 — Does my communication show that I take responsibility for my actions and emotions?
PQ 7.8 — Does my communication show that I take responsibility for my actions and emotions?
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When Someone “Makes” Us Feel Something
It’s very common to hear people say that someone “made” them feel something.
“She made me feel bad.”
“You make me so unhappy.”
“He makes me so frustrated.” » Read more
