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Dealing With Difficult Metamours

·512 words·3 mins

Let’s say your partner is seeing someone new, the reader wrote. And you don’t really like them. What do you do?

I nodded when I got this question. Aloud I said, “It happens. It definitely happens.”

And I wrote a blog post in response — “ Help, I Don’t Like My Metamour!: What to Do When You Don’t Like Who Your Partner Dates.” It was a really popular article when it came out, one that focused mostly on exploring the underlying reasons why you could feel that way and some very basic information about setting boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others.

I ended the post with the following sign-off:

But all is not lost!

More will come in a later post on some common difficult metamour behaviors and ways to deal with them.

It was 100% my intention to write that followup post. But I didn’t.

Instead, I wrote a book.

Because as I started to write that post, it occurred to me that I had much more to say than would fit in a single article — or even a series of them.

And so Dealing with Difficult Metamours was born.

Dealing with Difficult Metamours

Dealing with Difficult Metamours is the first book devoted solely to metamour relationships.

These days I’m a person who is frankly blessed with amazingly  gracious partners and metamours. But was it always this way? No way. I’ve had my fair share of difficult experiences with metamours. At one time, I had the Metamour from Hell.

And even though some time has passed since I’ve experienced major metamour strife, as a coach and a writer I continue to work with people who are struggling to get along with theirs.

The good news is that there are plenty of ways to reframe and deal with challenging metamour behaviors.

In this book, you’ll find the following:

  • The 10 most common difficult metamour behaviors and practical ways to deal with them
  • Tried and true, research-supported methods for having difficult conversations
  • Strategies for improving your overall personal resilience, no matter what stressful situation you find yourself in

While there’s plenty to be learned from tackling this book on your own, you’re likely to get the most benefit if you read it with your metamour and shared partner.

Because of that, I created a readers’ guide in the back of the book with activities and reflection questions for metamours and their shared partners that can help facilitate discussions about the material.

I have done my very best whenever possible to give readers practical advice and takeaways — suggestions that are tested and actually work_. _I’ve also tried to provide the reader with strategies for coping better with situations where they don’t have much influence or control over what happens.

It’s the book that I desperately wished had existed when I was dealing with a challenging metamour.


You can purchase the book from the links below. Want to help out? Leave a review after you’ve read the book.

Thank you all!



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