This marriage is very different from my first. I can almost always count on Skypook, and I could never count on Seth (seriously, almost never in practice), but on the same token, Seth was such a screw-up that it was basically impossible to disappoint him. Well, maybe that’s not true. Seth would get all outraged and stuff when we were out of money and judge me for making dicey financial choices to get us through hard times (while he was simultaneously not working and frittering away large sums of money on frivolous extras), but I never took it seriously because I didn’t respect him the way I respect Skyspook. And that’s hard. I’ve been working really hard to adjust over the 4 years I’ve been with Skyspook, and I still feel like I don’t have the proper skills for managing the particular anxieties of this marriage, although it’s a lot better than it used to be (I still hate disappointing him)- I hope I develop them.