Our psychological and emotional positions in the sadomasochist realm firmly established, I’d broached the topic of D/s. I wanted to know where we were going.
“Well, what do you want?” he asked me.
It was a simple question, but for some reason I found myself unable to answer him. I find this to be the case when I care too much about what I’m about to say—I clam up, shake my head impotently, change the subject.
I want the layers pulled back.
I want acknowledgment that the knots you tie bind both of us.
I want to improve you as much as you improve me.
I want: pain, humiliation, roughness, darkness, energy exchange – aftercare.
I want symbiosis.
I want to be wanted, not just tolerated, but wanted.
I want to be brave.
I want you to be brave.
I want to be more together than we are apart.
I want to build something.
I want us both to be surprised.