Your Daily Polyamory Blog for Navigating Life, Relationships, and More
I’ve never liked the moment before things happen. Never liked the silence before someone opens their mouth to speak and I suspect they’re going to say something bad.
I’ve never liked the time I’ve spent rehearsing a difficult conversation before it happens. Mapping out endless contingencies. Telling myself “well if they say this, » Read more
“I just realized why an artist creates something they never show anybody else,” he says.
“Why’s that?” I ask.
“It’s about loving yourself. Because you create it for yourself,” he says.
I don’t know quite how to explain it to him. How that explanation really makes no sense to me, » Read more
Writing is a form of communication, that’s for damn sure.
And it’s when you forget that it’s communication that your writing suffers.
But a lot of people think writing is communication that’s simply about sending messages. I mean, it totally is. Unless it’s private like a diary, when you write, » Read more
“So what do you do for a living?” they asked me.
“I’m a writer,” I said.
“Ohhh,” they replied. “What sorts of things do you write?”
Everyone always asks this question. It’s interesting to me how reliable this is. Back when I held a variety of other jobs, I found that followup questions were rare. » Read more
“I have to write a piece for Monday, but I’m having the hardest time coming up with something,” I say.
“Who says you have to write anything?” he asks.
“I do. I have a deadline,” I reply.
I explain to him that I have lots of ideas, just none of them seem like they’ll work. » Read more
I’m sitting in a pew, attending mass at the church I attended growing up.
It’s been 7 years since I went to a service here, on another visit to my hometown, but surprisingly little has changed since then.
Actually, surprisingly little has changed from 30 years ago, when I was a small child doing my best to remain quiet and tolerate the unending boredom, » Read more
Rejection. Ugh. It’s awful.
Looking around at everyone I’ve ever known, I can’t honestly think of a person who enjoys rejection.
And I wish I could say that I’ve always taken it gracefully, but I can’t. Looking back, I can remember times when I was basically a big old baby in the face of rejection. » Read more
People make a lot of assumptions about you when you have a large platform. Especially when you’re just starting to break through.
You get the strangest comments from people, ones that clearly assume things about your personality and intention for writing that aren’t in the pieces themselves. That are instead drawn from people’s opinions of what writers who have grown popular must be like personality-wise. » Read more
It’s been interesting, the past decade. Polyamory went from being a relatively obscure term, something that was only discussed in low-tech ancient discussion groups that looked basically like .txt files posted by a few obsessive outliers, to being covered by major news outlets. (The history of this emergence is well covered by Alan M’s blog Polyamory in the News)
While people disagree on whether consensual non-monogamy has caught on as a practice during that time (some people say no, » Read more
By now, practically everyone has heard of IKEA, thanks to their increasingly expanding set of stores as well as Jonathan Coulton’s excellent tribute song to them. (“Billy the bookcase says hello” by the way.) And anyone who has any firsthand experience with IKEA knows that while they offer timeless modernist style at scandalous prices, it also comes with a time commitment. » Read more
