The Difference Between Not Being Upset and Wanting to Not Be Upset
There was a difference between not being upset and wanting to not be upset. And I had been conflating the two.
Aw heck.
There was a difference between not being upset and wanting to not be upset. And I had been conflating the two.
Aw heck.
I’ve stopped myself, reeling from the surreal feeling of so many things going wrong, and I’ve said, “Well, at least it didn’t ruin a good mood.”
I’m watching you fight a bully. And it takes everything I have to not step in and fight on your behalf. But I do it for a simple reason: You asked me not to intervene.
I find myself wondering if I’ll one day be able to look back on this time and edit it into something cohesive, something presentable. Or if it’ll remain one thing that evades meaning-making.
Trying too hard to get a refund on the cost of experience just ends up making you act like a Karen.
*No one fed us!* my cat is screaming. *He’s doing the thing he normally does after he feeds us. We’re doomed. We’re gonna diiiiiiiie!*
“Part of me wonders if I’ll always be doing this — overloading myself until I can’t cope and then paring back and getting stressed again and loading myself back up.”
A recent study found that when people had nightmares, it resulted not only in decreased mood and health the following day but also an increased physiological response to stress.
Being terrified but powerless can make you feel like you have nothing to lose. So why not tackle all the scary things?
It’s hard to solve complex problems if you’re upset. But people think you’re not taking something seriously if you’re not upset. Mindfulness made me seem shady in times of conflict.