A Perfectionist Circle: How I Became Attracted to Work Ethic

a round pink button pin that reads "Have an ordinary day..." on it. There's an emoji with a neutral expression on it.
Image by JD Hancock / CC BY

I don’t know how it happened, but I seem to have become someone that is attracted primarily to ambition. Passion. Work ethic.

And completely turned off by laziness.

The Lazy One

I’m the child of two perfectionists. No matter what I did, it was never good enough. My parents were very quick to point out my mistakes and very quiet about my successes.  » Read more

Continue Reading

How Are We Supposed to Really Understand Sex If We’re Not Comfortable Talking About It?

a black background with white lettering. The words read "Censored"
Image by Guerretto / CC BY

It’s happy hour at the bar with Skyspook’s coworkers. I’m his designated driver and feeling a bit out of place as a plus one. Most of the people there I’m meeting for the first time, and they’re nice enough, so I do my best to chat with them.

I’m relieved when Skyspook’s boss walks up to me since we’ve met in the past and talked before.  » Read more

Continue Reading

How I Accidentally Got Closure On One Relationship From Another

a broken heart-shaped mirror sitting on a red flower on what appears to be pavement
Image by TimOve / CC BY

“I love you,” Skyspook said. “And that’s why if you go back there, back to that house, this relationship is over.”

“Yeah,” Seth said. “You’re not going back there.”

I’d just gotten done telling them (my husband and boyfriend) and two of our friends — Crock and Hilda — about an unfortunate incident with my other partner Rob.  » Read more

Continue Reading

PQ 12.5 — Do I trust my partner to make good decisions about whom she starts relationships with? Why or why not? What might the consequences be if she makes a poor decision, and how might I deal with those consequences?

a closeup of a cookbook page. The recipe that's partially shown is Sauteed Brussel Sprouts with Bacon
Image by Didriks / CC BY

PQ 12.5 — Do I trust my partner to make good decisions about whom she starts relationships with? Why or why not? What might the consequences be if she makes a poor decision, and how might I deal with those consequences?

*

Ooooo boy, this question.

The answer these days regarding my anchor partner Skyspook,  » Read more

Continue Reading

Dobby Is a Free Elf: Polyamorous Partying Without Expectations

an office setting. Two men sit behind computer monitor in the background. In the foreground, a statue of Dobby the house elf from Harry Potter stands staring forward.
Image by Weltbild Verlag GmbH / CC BY

It all started with a silly meme that I made for Poly.Land’s Facebook page, mixing polyamory with a bit of Harry Potter. “Dobby has no master. Dobby is a free elf.”

But as fate would have it, I was throwing a party at my house that very evening. The first one since I started dating my three partners that they would all be in attendance: Skyspook,  » Read more

Continue Reading

PQ 11.7 — Will the term secondary be applied to my relationship, and if so, do I understand how the primary couple is defining the word? Am I comfortable with the definition?

a very complicated flowchart that is of hierarchy without a company structure, many smiley faces of various colors are connected by a vast network of lines. nothing is really labeled
Image by Jurgen Appelo / CC BY

PQ 11.7 — Will the term secondary be applied to my relationship, and if so, do I understand how the primary couple is defining the word? Am I comfortable with the definition?

*

A new thread appears in one of the poly discussion groups I’m in.  Asking people for their input on what the terms “primary”  » Read more

Continue Reading
1 2 3 11