I Wasn’t Always Polyamorous. Dating Was Like a Game of Musical Chairs.

a bunch of white chairs formed in a circle with the seats facing outward, like in a game of musical chairs
Image by rick / CC BY

I often feel very alien when I find myself amongst a a pack of other polyamorous educators. It’s very common to hear a familiar story from them: They’ve always been polyamorous. Monogamy never seemed quite right to them. They went through life framing relationships in a different way than other people. Conducting themselves polyamorously before they knew the word.  » Read more

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I had a dream last night that my ex-boyfriend Rob* randomly showed up for one of our parties. The other guests were instantly uncomfortable. Rob asked to talk to me privately. Despite many disapproving glances, I agreed and went off to another room to talk to him alone.

In the real world, Rob and I had a really shitty breakup,  » Read more

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Abuse

I was in a relationship for many years where whenever I asked for any assistance, albeit with finances, chores, or emotional support, I was told that I was abusive and a burden and responsible for causing his depression by “being such a bitch.”

I was told that even bringing up the topic of sex or attempting seduction more than once or twice a week was sexual coercion and attempted rape and that I was guilty of repeated habitual sexual assault by baring my breasts unprompted or touching him without invitation to do so –  » Read more

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The Power of Words

1997

The day after it happens, I go to school with a headache and slivers of memory. There are pieces missing, things I can’t find an explanation for. When I see the smirking faces, I feel blood burning in my brain, my body reacting without any input from my mind. I bolt to the bathroom and throw up.  » Read more

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