“I honestly don’t know what I expected out of polyamorous people, but you guys aren’t at all what I thought you’d be like.”
I laugh. “What do you mean by that?”
“Don’t take it the wrong way,” she says.
“I’m not offended or anything. I just want to understand what you’re talking about. » Read more
Rejection. Ugh. It’s awful.
Looking around at everyone I’ve ever known, I can’t honestly think of a person who enjoys rejection.
And I wish I could say that I’ve always taken it gracefully, but I can’t. Looking back, I can remember times when I was basically a big old baby in the face of rejection. » Read more
Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.
Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).
Here’s what they wrote for us today:
Finding Something Problematic Tells Me More About You
As someone who does the delicate dance between the worlds of social justice and diversity and inclusion, » Read more
Picture it. Quebec City 1999.
We’ve been to six bars in one night. And we’ve made the most of each. It’s the first time I’ve ever had a Long Island Iced Tea. I’ve lost count of how many Jane’s bought me, but they’re hitting me pretty hard.
I’ve been staring at Jane a little bit too long for weeks as she’s getting dressed and undressed at the dorm. » Read more
I’ve always envied people who are impervious to criticism, thick-skinned. Tough people. Insults seem to roll off them like water off a duck’s back, as the cliche goes.
The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve realized that having thick skin isn’t always as effortless as it seems. Sure, some people are more naturally inclined that way. » Read more
PQ 9.3 — Am I afraid to say I may need to leave this relationship?
It was the worst sex of my life. By far. I regretted it instantly.
My body basically rejected his. “No, not this one,” it said. Just like taste buds declare something disgusting. » Read more
I recently stumbled across a piece by Heina Dadabhoy called “Polyamory: What No One Warned Me About.” As Dadabhoy writes:
Polyamory makes it worse in that the usual rationalizations for getting dumped don’t work when you were poly with the person and they remain poly after the break-up.
“They left me so they could date someone prettier/smarter/easier/better than me”? » Read more
It’s a common rule that a lot of people have when they open up their relationships: No friends.
It’s likely one of those carryovers from traditional dating wisdom. Don’t date friends because most relationships break up, and if you break up with someone, you’re likely to ruin the friendship.
But my dirty secret: I nearly always date friends. » Read more
“Dating is the worst,” she says.
“Tell me about it.”
“I’m just tired of explaining myself,” she says. “Over and over again.”
“Oh? The poly stuff?” I ask, thinking of this meme.
“Well, sure,” she says. “That doesn’t help. Doing a polyamory 101 orientation every time I turn around.” » Read more