The Reasons Nobody Gets to Be a Dating “Expert”

a steampunk Trojan horse
Image by Tama Leaver / CC BY

“So what do you do for a living?” they asked me.

“I’m a writer,” I said.

“Ohhh,” they replied. “What sorts of things do you write?”

Everyone always asks this question. It’s interesting to me how reliable this is. Back when I held a variety of other jobs, I found that followup questions were rare.  » Read more

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PQ 25.6 — If I am thinking of staying closeted, is it because I face genuine and serious risks, or am I concerned about being inconvenienced or losing status?

it's a photograph of a person with long hair who is wearing a ski hat, a winter coat, and mittens. They have their hands covering their face, as though they are embarrassed
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

PQ 25.6 — If I am thinking of staying closeted, is it because I face genuine and serious risks, or am I concerned about being inconvenienced or losing status?

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Fear is a funny thing. Often it’s very binary, when you feel fear. You get that worry, that pit in your stomach.  » Read more

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PQ 25.5 — What risks do I face — including personal, professional, or physical — in being public about my polyamorous relationships? Are these risks I can afford to take?

5 colorful shacks on a beach. Colors, from left to right: Yellow, green, blue, pinkish-purple, and red
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

PQ 25.5 — What risks do I face — including personal, professional, or physical — in being public about my polyamorous relationships? Are these risks I can afford to take?

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The decision whether to come out or not is a deeply personal one. In my own case, I’ve been out for many years,  » Read more

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