A fifth reason came to me as to Why So Few Polyamorists Write in Great Detail (aside from through anonymous or near-anonymous outlets, as PolyLogGal so astutely pointed out in her comments on yesterday’s post). I also thought this might be a good opportunity to talk a bit about my mistakes and times where I’ve been the villain in someone else’s story, » Read more
Unnaturally Poly
A lot of my favorite poly bloggers share a similar story: They came to polyamory naturally. Monogamy just wasn’t a thing that they did well (or at all). Sure, they would try to fit themselves into that box, particularly when they came upon someone they truly cared about who expressed that exclusivity was important to them, » Read more
Sexile/Pop-Tarts
It’s strange to admit this, but making plans to hang with a hot friend of mine, I realized that when it comes to partner selection that I put just about as much thought into what sort of metamour situation I could possibly be creating as to my level of interest in the person. It probably comes from being spectacularly webbed up in 2011 and the strain some of those metamour relationships put on me as a hinge, » Read more
The Possibility of Blowing Darth Vader
The more time passes and I float along the slipstream of my particular happily-ever-after, the more I am impressed with the fact that I was able to be monogamous with a vanilla man (and one with low libido, no less) for 8 years, no easy feat for an oversexed homoflexible kinkster who bonds easily with others. » Read more
Layers
When Skyspook and I first started dating 3 years ago, he was seeing 2 other married women in addition to me, and I had a husband, another boyfriend, and 2 girlfriends. There were also a few others that I sent intimate texts and emails to that would have gotten me in trouble if I had been exclusively partnered–including the notorious Slut Monkey! » Read more
I’m Sure You’re Delicious, But I’m Not At All Hungry
It was an odd situation. There I was, surrounded by three people who told me, readily, constantly that they loved me, and I had rarely felt less supported, more cornered.
It had started with shopping followed by dinner and drinks: A pitcher of margaritas, radioactive green, cheap as hell, and a la pokemon, » Read more
Fear Unmasks Itself
Earlier this week, I posted a blog entry called “mono guilt,” in which I felt like I was in a lose/lose situation regarding staying monogamous with Skyspook versus opening up our relationship. Since we mutually decided to close our relationship roughly a year ago and both report satisfaction with being sexually exclusive to one another, » Read more
mono guilt
I find myself vacillating between which will kill my relationship with Skyspook faster, which is the bigger risk: Staying monogamous with him, limiting his options, potentially choking that new fresh spark out of us once and for all with a lack of sexual variety and/or a feeling that I’m trying to control him or own his sexuality – » Read more
Goodbye, White Knight
In February of 2010, I’m walking through the streets of Bangor late at night in 4-inch patent leather heels with a handsome man holding my hand, steadying me. He’s a friend I’ve made out with a few times. We’ve both had a fair amount of drink, left the party to take a walk for the privacy, » Read more