I’m sitting in a pew, attending mass at the church I attended growing up.
It’s been 7 years since I went to a service here, on another visit to my hometown, but surprisingly little has changed since then.
Actually, surprisingly little has changed from 30 years ago, when I was a small child doing my best to remain quiet and tolerate the unending boredom, » Read more
A while back, I wrote an essay called “It’s Easy to Convince Yourself That an Opportunity Has Passed Forever, But That Doesn’t Mean You’re Right.”
In that piece, I talk about how I’d ask for science toys for Christmas, but my mother would shake her head. She’d say, “You’ll blow up the house.” » Read more
I’ve Been Poly My Whole Life — Polymathic
I’m different than a lot of other polyamorous educators because I haven’t been polyamorous my whole life. In fact, polyamory wasn’t even something I seriously considered until I was in my late 20s. Before then, I hadn’t even heard of the word. And I couldn’t fathom how non-monogamous relationships could be conducted in a way that was respectful and mutually beneficial for everyone involved. » Read more
I have a friend who shows up early whenever I throw a party. Just a bit before it officially starts. And when he arrives, we pregame together while my nesting partner puts the finishing touches on the food. We sit and have a drink, catch up on old news.
My friend shows up early knowing that he’ll see behind the scenes. » Read more
I still think fondly of Jay.
I met Jay at a student pagan gathering. When I’d called the office asking if atheists were welcome (how I identified at the time), I was assured that they were completely interfaith. Even practitioners of Abrahamic religions were encouraged to attend.
But I noted as soon as I arrived that I was surrounded by Wiccans. » Read more
I’m standing in a lushly decorated rooftop bar holding a drink that cost me more than I think a drink should. Although it’s a heavy pour, so that’s good. I’m dressed to the nines. Chic dress, lace pumps, suit coat. I’d spent hours earlier combing my wardrobe for the best pieces, looking for something that says “trendy businesswoman mixed with just a touch of first lady.” » Read more
I’m thinking about Charlie Howard again. Although queer kids from Maine don’t really stop thinking about him.
If you’ve read Stephen King’s It (or watched the miniseries from the 90’s), you may be familiar with the scene where teenagers throw a gay man into the river.
But it’s not just a horrific scene. » Read more
PQ 7.1 — How do I directly ask for what I need?
People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
For the longest time, the idea of asking for what I needed directly? » Read more
“I’m a fraud and others will find out”
There it is, right in the “FEARS” worksheet. Fuck you, Step 4. Moral Inventory bullshit. I wince, feel the rage rise up within me. I sigh.
Whenever I experience this level of anger, what’s being said is either very true or very untrue. » Read more