I’ve been meaning to cover this topic on the blog for a while. As some of you know, I write essays fairly frequently that deal with apologies. While research has shown that people are generally quite unforgiving (a finding I find personally depressing, as people are also imperfect and mess up, » Read more
Not All Romantic Gestures Look the Same
I’m not really a morning person and not really an evening person. I function about equally well all day long (even took a test that confirmed it). Sometimes I refer to myself as an asynchronous person. How I feel is more a function of how much sleep I got the night before than what time of day or night it is at the moment. » Read more
“Don’t Worry, I’ll Take Care of It”
“Don’t worry,” you say. “I’ll take care of it.”
I’m sick. Suffering from a hemiplegic migraine. The left side of my body has betrayed me once again by putting out its own lights. I knew I was in trouble the moment that the aura started. I did my best to close my eyes and relax. » Read more
Ways to Bridge the Gap If Your Partner’s Top Love Language Is Words of Affirmation & Yours Isn’t
Hi Page!
I’m a long time reader of your blog and I have a mostly positive question! About feeeeelings. And communication styles.
I’ve currently got two lovely partners, one nesting and one not, and things are going great. Edging towards serious territory even. Nesting partner loves other partner and we’re all really good about the communication thing. » Read more
Myers-Briggs & Love Languages Aren’t Scientifically Valid, But That Doesn’t Make Them Useless.
In 2008 I became obsessed with Myers-Briggs. For those who haven’t heard of it, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality test that gives you a 4-letter result. Each letter is a different binary that represents a dimension of personality.
The first letter of a Myers-Briggs result is either E for Extroversion or I for Introversion. » Read more
The Love Languages Are All Attention
I was teaching a class a while back on an unrelated topic when a student interjected with an observation. The Love Languages framework is arguably one of the most popular and widely understood relationship models these days (and I write about it myself from time to time), so it was no surprise when they brought it up. » Read more
When You Have the Right Love Language But Are Speaking at the Wrong Volume
“You know, Page,” he says, “it seems like every time I turn around, I bump into someone who has just discovered the Love Languages framework, and they’re so excited about it.”
I nod. “I know what you mean. I can actually remember when I first heard of it about 10 years ago, » Read more
I Realize I’m Loved at the Strangest Times, from the Smallest Things
It’s Saturday. We’re both working in the living room on our laptops.
Delighted as always to be workaholics.
His Spotify mix is playing in the background, a kind of active white noise to smooth out the normal ambient noises. The peaks and silences of the house. Our neighbors. The street.
I’m not even registering the music, » Read more
Feeling Loved and Being Loved Are Different
I recently published an article called “When I’m Asking Why You Love Me, I’m Really Asking What Love Is to You.” I was pleasantly surprised by how much of a positive reception it received from readers. And how much of a conversation that formed in response.
That post is about how I realized after I went through my divorce that even though my ex-husband said he loved me all the time that when he and I were talking about love that we were talking about different things. » Read more
Forget Grand Gestures. Relationships Are Lost (or Won) in the Details.
Practice yourself, for heaven’s sake in little things, and then proceed to greater.
-Epicetus
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We have more possibilities in each moment than we realize.
-Thich Nhat Hanh
Forget Grand Gestures. Relationships Are Lost (or Won) in the Details.
The way that successful romantic relationships are framed is often very deceiving. » Read more