I’ve never quite gotten the hang of comforting myself. It’s not for lack of trying. Not for lack of practice.
It’s strange, really, since I’ve been a comforting person to so many people. I’ve been the one dropping everything to help a lover work through an issue. The one you could literally wake up in the middle of the night and talk to about your nightmares. » Read more
There’s a meme I made a while back that I post from time to time. The lead-in caption reads, “When you’re making up with someone and they take responsibility for their part in the argument and you also take responsibility for yours.”
Beneath this lead-in is a photograph of actress Tatyana Ali in her role of Ashley Banks on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. » Read more
I’ve been thinking about it for a couple of days. When I first started to worry, I thought maybe it would be a passing thought. A lot of things are. Most things are no big deal, and with time a concern seems silly.
But this one worry has persisted. And I’ve spent most of the day preceding thinking about it. » Read more
Why do people break up? If we were to take direction from movies and TV in answering this question, it would be reasonable to assume that breakups come about because of things like fighting, lying, infidelity, or insecurities constantly rearing their ugly heads.
But a recent study found that this wasn’t the case. » Read more
I can tell you almost anything, but I can’t tell you everything.
I wish I could. That it were that simple. I wish that I could just open up and tell you all of it. Everything that’s troubling me. Everything that excites me. The interesting parts, the boring parts. Everything in between.
But I can’t. » Read more
“We finish each other’s–”
–Arrested Development (and later, Frozen)
It’s kind of the best feeling… when you get close enough to a person that you feel like you know what they’re going to say next. When you can actually accurately finish their sentences. » Read more
I recently wrote a post called “Territorial Markers Aren’t a Great Proxy for Love.” In it, I talk about the time I was challenged because my husband shared a rainbow wine glass with a guest. Without my realizing it, those particular glasses had become emotionally linked to a romantic trip we’d taken together. » Read more
“Love is essential, gregariousness is optional.”
“Whacha thinking?” I ask him.
“Nothing much. Just chilling,” he says.
And yet I know there’s more to it. It’s just that thoughts don’t translate into words as well as he’d like. It’s not easy for him to bring them up to the surface, » Read more
PQ 8.8 — Is sex the glue that holds our relationship together? If my partner has sex with someone else, do I think the relationship will come unglued?
As I mentioned before, I’m hypersexual. And a large part of my personal development re: relationships has been learning to control my libido. » Read more
PQ 5.2 — What needs do I have from my partners, in terms of time, emotional availability, commitment, communication and intimacy?
Sometimes I think life would be easier if I had a fixed idea of what a “partner” is.
But I don’t.
I look back on all the people that I’ve known and loved, » Read more