My ex-partner liked to say that I was needy, clingy, and dependent.
When I started dating someone new, they told me that I was incredibly autonomous, self-reliant, and independent. That they were used to their partners leaning on them a helluva lot more than what I asked. That they were used to relationships being one-sided, » Read more
Hey there! I’m new to poly, I’ve only been doing it for less than a year. I’ve been following your writings for that time and they’ve been a great help.
I still struggle with jealousy though, anxiety attacks, and just generally feeling terrible when my partner goes to explore new connections. » Read more
A moment of awareness that someone you’ve known for years still has a private and mysterious inner life, and somewhere in the hallways of their personality is a door locked from the inside, a stairway leading to a wing of the house that you’ve never fully explored, an unfinished attic that will remain maddeningly unknown to you, » Read more
As I wrote in a recent post, I recently moved cross country and have discovered that in spite of my assumption that I’d rush out and get socially connected ASAP that I am very introverted in my new home.
It’s a sharp 180 from my normal way of relating. » Read more
Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.
Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).
Here’s what they wrote for us today:
Finding Something Problematic Tells Me More About You
As someone who does the delicate dance between the worlds of social justice and diversity and inclusion, » Read more
Can a solo poly person be a nesting partner?
Thanks for the question! Before I dive deeply into it, let’s first explore the definitions of those two terms for readers who might be unfamiliar with them. » Read more
What Is a Nesting Partner?
“So I’m seeing this guy,” she says. “And he says he’s poly, but…”
“He’s so not okay with my seeing other people. He has a bunch of other partners. Seems like he falls in love every five minutes. But the second I look at someone else, he’s a mess.” » Read more
“God hath given you one face, and you make yourself another.”
-William Shakespeare, Hamlet
On countless mornings, I glimpse my reflection in the mirror and want to punch myself in the face.
Because I look like her at certain angles.
Her chin, » Read more
PQ 9.9 — Am I being asked to give up relationships with friends or family?
It’s funny. Back when I became monogamous with Seth, I didn’t give a single thought to my autonomy. When we got together, I basically stepped out of my own life and into his. When he didn’t like one of my friends, » Read more
“Could Non-Monogamy Save Your Marriage?”
I’m asked this fairly often, if I think non-monogamy is a good way to fix a troubled relationship. And outsiders often assume that this is the major reason that relationships open up in the first place.
But it wasn’t that way for me at all. When Seth and I opened up, » Read more