I’m not sure why I feel so apologetic whenever Mom asks the question I’m getting used to getting from her. “Are the covid cases going down in Dallas yet?”
“No,” I text back. “They’re going up.”
It’s been a long string of record days. Everything’s going in the wrong direction.
A Different Funeral Experience Than Any of Us Had Planned
When Dad passed away in April, » Read more
I don’t write about it all that often because weight tends to be a touchy or full-on traumatizing matter for people, regardless of your relationship to it, but from 2009-2012, I lost 160 pounds.
The first question people typically ask at this point is “how did you do it?” The answer usually disappoints them. » Read more
How am I doing?
One day I’m going to look back on this time and remember how hard it was and thank past me for surviving.
But when you’re on the ground level living through a rough patch, it can be pretty overwhelming.
I reach the end of the day, » Read more
Here’s a truth for you: someone in your life has died. And now, nobody knows what to say, and it’s going to really, really piss you off. That’s the nature of the beast here. Nobody knows what to say, so they will say things that are quite stupid. And they’ll say things that make you cry and things that’ll make you want to punch them in their ugly fucking face. » Read more
Ever since my father passed away in April, I’ve been talking to my mother a lot more. We haven’t had the best relationship, my mother and I. It’s long and complicated. Mostly, she’s wanted to be close to me, although she doesn’t actually like me as a person (and I don’t much like her). » Read more
My father passed away in mid April, and I’ve been doing my best to deal with my grief since then. These are extraordinarily strange times, what with the global pandemic, confirmed recession and probably economic depression, and large-scale demonstrations protesting police brutality and racial inequality.
Even without 2020 being ridiculous on the grand scale, » Read more
My father passed away six weeks ago.
The first time I typed out that sentence, I accidentally wrote, “My father passed away six years ago.” And if that isn’t telling, I don’t know what it is.
Anyway, while dealing with my own grief and of course everything else all other Americans are up against this unsettled spring (pandemic, » Read more
I woke up cheerful this morning.
Normally, this wouldn’t be big news. In general, I have a very positive disposition.
I do get grumpy. I do get sad. Things can and do annoy me.
Part of being a resilient person involves acknowledging reality. And anyone who has any sort of meaningful, » Read more
There is a monster sitting on my chest.
No one else can see him.
But I know he’s there. I can feel him sitting there. He’s comfortable where he is. He’s happiest when I’m unhappy. Most comfortable when I’m uncomfortable.
He comes and goes as he pleases. Sometimes, though, » Read more
It’s been a month since my father died. That sentence, as I type it, feels like a lie. And not simply because a substantial part of me wishes it weren’t true, that my father were still alive, but also because of the “month” part.
Because even though I can look at the calendar, » Read more