It was a simpler time, once upon a time.
I can still remember believing that most people were reasonable, open-minded. I can remember assuming that people cared about other people.
I didn’t realize back then that empathy wasn’t universal. That life had a way of hardening us to the pains of other people. » Read more
It’s well known that dishonesty can be damaging to interpersonal relationships. When we find out someone has lied to us, it can be very difficult to trust them again.
But how about the other side of things? When someone has lied to us, even if no one discovers that they have lied, does the act carry consequences for them as well? » Read more
You’d like to think if you were rich that you would do good things with the money. That you’d become a philanthropist, change the world. That you wouldn’t be one of those ole-timey villain millionaires (villainaires?) sitting atop a giant pile of money like a dragon hoarding a cache of gold coins.
Right? » Read more
It’s something they warn all new therapists about, the plague of people in the helping professions: Compassion fatigue.
Compassion fatigue is also sometimes known as secondary traumatic stress disorder or vicarious stress.
It’s a lot like it sounds. Compassion fatigue occurs when you spend so much time taking care of other people, » Read more
“I mean, the way I figure it,” I said. “The worst thing that happens here is that I take a risk, and I get hurt. No big deal. I’ve been hurt before. I lived.”
“Oh God,” she replied. “That’s the last thing I’d want to do. To hurt you. I couldn’t stand it.” » Read more
“Page, how are you doing?” she asks, and before I can answer, she adds. “You know, it’s really been too long.”
“Oh you’re probably right,” I say. “Fair warning: My sense of time has been all messed up lately. I think that things that happened 6 months ago just happened and that last week was last year.” » Read more
I recently stumbled across a post over at Esther Perel’s blog called “Relationship accountability and the rise of ghosting.” Post author Lindsay addresses consequences of the trend towards ambiguous entanglement and indirect and prolonged breakups and argues for more direct breakups, which they dub “power parting.”
It’s a good article with valid points and includes this chart that helpfully organizes the concepts. » Read more
On its face, Masterchef Junior is a lot like other reality TV cooking competitions. Cooks are pitted against each other week to week as they face various wildly improbable challenges. Something like cooking for the client from Hell, armed only with canned mushrooms.
Making pasta from scratch within a ridiculous time limit.
That kind of thing. » Read more
In an earlier post, “Altruism Is Freaking Dead Sexy, Giving Is Hot,” I discussed a recent research study which suggested that a giving nature could predispose a person to have more sex partners.
In “Being Slutty Made Me More Empathetic” sex journalist Kate Sloan argues that the conclusion of this study could have the causality quite backwards. » Read more
PQ 4.2 — What do I consider essential, indispensable elements of a relationship?
I used to be a big checklist person when it came to partner selection — it was easy for me to list the elements of a “dream partner.” And I expected others to evaluate me in turn. » Read more