My first close friendships were blisteringly intense.
I had one childhood friend, Emma, whose parents were both zoologists. Emma’s family let me come along with them on their family vacations. I can remember vividly, even now, lying with Emma under the covers at night in an old farmhouse as the wind made noise in the rafters, » Read more
About a year and a half ago, I found myself in a poly relationship. I didn’t get into it under the best circumstances, though.
I had found out that my husband had been exploiting me for a decade and he was really turned on by the idea of me sleeping around, » Read more
Unfortunately, there’s no shortage of people who will judge you based on what your partner does — or doesn’t do.
I noticed this when I first got married. I’d fallen in love with my husband for a number of reasons. An unflappable sense of confidence, a warm sense of humor, a kind of charm that’s difficult for me even now to explain. » Read more
If her doubts had started on her wedding day, I probably would have called them cold feet.
But they didn’t.
She started wanting to back out a full six months before the wedding.
“This sounds really serious,” I’d tell her. “What are you going to do?”
“What can I do?” » Read more
It probably should have been a bigger early warning sign when I started dating my first husband. But he really didn’t like my friends.
“Why?” I asked him. “Why don’t you like them?”
He answered this with a shrug. “I just don’t,” he said. “I don’t like spending time around them.” » Read more
A lot of people involuntarily cringe when you use the word “deserve,” regardless of context. Because the way most people talk about who’s deserving and who isn’t, there’s a deterministic bent to it, an underlying belief that some of us are born into this world entitled to happiness and prosperity. And others aren’t. Usually this is predicated on factors beyond our control: How rich our parents are, » Read more
“We finish each other’s–”
–Arrested Development (and later, Frozen)
Have you ever been so close to someone that you knew what they were going to say next?
It turns out that scientists are researching this, why this happens, » Read more
My entire life I’ve been that person that others feel comfortable opening up to. I’m not sure what it is, exactly. Maybe it’s because I’m so average looking, like a movie extra. The girl next door. Cute when viewed from certain angles but not terribly distinctive in appearance.
I personally find it weirdly easy to form positive impressions of new folks when they look like people from my past I’m quite fond of (transference, » Read more
Hi Page! Your writing has been such a source of community and inspiration for me, especially as someone fairly new to polyamory. I’m wondering: what is your experience with healing from a breakup while still in other romantic relationships? My long-term partner and I recently broke up. I started seeing someone else pretty shortly afterwards. » Read more
I recently published an article called “When I’m Asking Why You Love Me, I’m Really Asking What Love Is to You.” I was pleasantly surprised by how much of a positive reception it received from readers. And how much of a conversation that formed in response.
That post is about how I realized after I went through my divorce that even though my ex-husband said he loved me all the time that when he and I were talking about love that we were talking about different things. » Read more