It can be a difficult balance to strike in polyamory: How to add new partners to an existing relationship system without upsetting the relationships that are already in place.
A number of common strategies exist. Some relationship systems have extensive permission structures in place. Existing partners are consulted and each is called upon to approve or veto potential new relationships. » Read more
My second book, a quickstart guide for people looking to open up their relationships (especially geeky couples), is almost done. The beta readers have given their feedback, and I’m fixing the final draft as we speak so that Skyspook can finish the layout. Eeeeee! So exciting! Coming soon — don’t worry, you won’t miss it. » Read more
PQ 10.5 — What happens if the agreement doesn’t work for my partners, or my partners’ partners?
“If Your Calendar Shows That You’re Available, I Expect You to Be Here”
“I looked at your calendar. There wasn’t anything on it,” Michelle said.
“Ah,” I said, not sure where she was going. » Read more
PQ 9.5 — Is someone threatening my well-being, safety or livelihood?
Threatening well-being, safety or livelihood? That sounds fairly extreme now, doesn’t it?
And yet — as in PQ 9.1, it’s important to note that sometimes these threats onset in rather insidious ways. That’s the tricky thing about abusive relationships. » Read more
“Hands Off That Guilt!”
Last week, we posted “Distressed by Another’s Jealousy: How to Deal with Guilt from Hurting a Partner” in response to a reader who wrote in asking for help.
The piece drew a lot of interest. Most of it was positive and thanked us for tackling a common issue that isn’t often addressed by existing poly how-to. » Read more
When polyamory is good, it’s very good indeed. And when it’s not? When it’s bad, it’s horrid.
Whether you’re polyamorous, monogamous, or somewhere in between, here are some relationship red flags to look out for:
1. Your partner is putting you in double binds.
A double bind is when a person sends out two different messages, » Read more
“I need you to come to the office as soon as you can,” my editor said.
“O-o-h okay,” I stammered. After all, the phone call was pretty confusing. Usually he emailed me.
“And bring your tapes,” he said, before hanging up.
I was there within the hour and handed him the cassette tape from my last assignment. » Read more