Your Daily Polyamory Blog for Navigating Life, Relationships, and More
Ten years into my relationship with you, I’m still learning new things about you every day.
The optimist in me wants to say that this is a good sign. To say that this is how things should be.
Like a friend of mine used to say, we’re always growing and changing. » Read more
Like a lot of other people, I grew up in a house where we didn’t really discuss emotions at all — and certainly not negative emotions.
In fact, it wasn’t until I was in my 30s that I was good at differentiating between them and expressing them clearly. I’d learned that you said you were “mad” » Read more
Science’s role is to test hypotheses and uncover the truth. Sometimes this uncovered truth is surprising. Other times it’s a big duh, “Well thanks for the info, Captain Obvious” kind of moment.
Frankly, reality doesn’t care as much about our biases as we do.
Today’s study falls into the Duh Bucket for me. » Read more
Every writer has a different story of how they got into it. When they started. Why.
My own story starts in the third grade. Because for a few years prior to that point, sure, I could read and write. But I mostly did so in order to function in the world around me, » Read more
While I’m a generally sunny person with a positive temperament, I’m not immune to sadness. Self-doubt.
The timing of these slumps can be rather unpredictable. But the negative thoughts I experience? Well, those tend to fall into a few very predictable categories.
And when I’m down on myself, there’s one line of negative thinking that I tend to encounter over and over again: I start to think that no one likes me. » Read more
It’s one of the unfortunate realities of interpersonal communication: The way that you talk to people in healthy situations will cause major problems when you’re trying to talk to someone stuck in unhealthy dynamics. That’s because manipulative people with toxic personalities will hijack normal conversational maxims and norms and exploit them to their own ends. » Read more
My anxiety has often functioned like a shot clock, especially in social situations. Instead of feeling like I had plenty of time to answer someone who asked me a question, I would instead feel pressure to react immediately.
And every millisecond that elapsed before I was able to respond pained me greatly. » Read more
Communicosexual (adjective): finding the ability to effectively communicate and hold enjoyable conversation sexually attractive or arousing
Communicoromantic (adjective): being romantically attracted to individuals with which one can have effective communication and enjoyable conversation
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When it comes to dating and love, I’m actually pretty flexible in my expectations. I’m open to dating all sorts of folks. » Read more
It was kind of a running joke between all of us, back in the day. “Pete’s in three relationships, actually. He’s dating two women and he’s also obsessed with his phone.”
Because he was. It was pretty annoying when we were holding poker nights since he’d often become fixated on whatever texts he had coming in and would completely miss what was going on in the game. » Read more
In a recent essay, I wrote about 10 things that I do that help me write openly about my life without going crazy in the process. After that article came out, I had several readers write back in response. One point in particular seemed to resonate with many folks, tip #6, in which I discuss how to deal with people who are trying to stir up conflict, » Read more
