These days I live with a romantic partner who makes me very happy. Before I met them, I didn’t know this was actually possible. I’d had long-term relationships before, but I’d never been with someone who was so supportive. And frankly, even as responsive in conversation, if I really think about it (stumbling on today’s study prompted me to). » Read more
Writing Is As Much About Listening As It Is About Saying Things
Writing is a form of communication, that’s for damn sure.
And it’s when you forget that it’s communication that your writing suffers.
But a lot of people think writing is communication that’s simply about sending messages. I mean, it totally is. Unless it’s private like a diary, when you write, » Read more
We Don’t Know When It Ends, Let Alone How
I think everyone’s been asked one of the following hypotheticals — or something else like them:
What would do if it were the last day on Earth?
If you only had an hour left before the world ended, what would you do?
The trouble with all of those hypotheticals is that they require for us to definitively know the world is ending. » Read more
When We Get Close to People, We Overestimate How Effectively We Communicate With Them
“We finish each other’s–”
“Sandwiches.”
–Arrested Development (and later, Frozen)
*
It’s kind of the best feeling… when you get close enough to a person that you feel like you know what they’re going to say next. When you can actually accurately finish their sentences. » Read more
It’s Important to Remember We Don’t Know What We’re Missing
Sometimes the Internet seems like Pandora’s box. It’s easier than ever before for disinformation to spread. It makes the early ages of yellow journalism seem quaint in comparison.
But even as I say this, I can’t deny how many benefits it’s simultaneously presented. Online shopping is hard to ignore, how incredibly helpful it is to be able to get practically anything you’d ever want shipped to you… » Read more
“I Just Want to Talk About It to Prove to Myself I Can”
I’ve poured my heart out again. One of those ridiculous long-winded emotional spiels. The kind that leave me exhausted and worried after the fact.
Because it feels cathartic to get it all out, but the last thing I want to do is alienate the person I’m talking to. Overwhelm them. Cause some sort of secondary problem that I’m not in any shape to clean up. » Read more
I Always Think Introverts Hate Me When They Don’t
While I’ve had a couple of close friends who were extroverted (including my high school best friend), the vast majority of my close friends have been introverts.
That was how I got my social start back in elementary school. Shy kids flocked to me. I was often the group spokesperson, being brave on my friends’ » Read more
Knowing Your Partner Is Most Important, Regardless of Exactly HOW You Get That Information
A month ago, I published an essay called “Not All Romantic Gestures Look the Same,” in which I revealed something a little strange I do out of love:
My partner is definitely not a morning person. He needs a bit of time to warm up before he’s ready to people. » Read more
You Can Be Conditioned to Expect Communication to Be Full of Tricks and Traps
I grew up in a strict authoritarian household where I had very little freedom. It was a house in which you had to ask permission to have a glass of water — because after all, someone had to wash it later.
A promise to be the person who washed the glass wasn’t good enough. » Read more
Open Communication Doesn’t Magically Erase the Impact of Major Change
Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.
Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).
Here’s what they wrote for us today: » Read more
Why Don’t I Communicate More?