Ever since my father passed away in April, I’ve been talking to my mother a lot more. We haven’t had the best relationship, my mother and I. It’s long and complicated. Mostly, she’s wanted to be close to me, although she doesn’t actually like me as a person (and I don’t much like her). » Read more
There were no formerly heroic times, and there was no formerly pure generation. There is no one here but us chickens, and so it has always been: A people busy and powerful, knowledgeable, ambivalent, important, fearful, and self-aware; a people who scheme, promote, deceive, and conquer; who pray for their loved ones, and long to flee misery and skip death. » Read more
It can be satisfying to think about, especially when you’re reeling with a fresh pain. When someone has wronged you. Fantasizing about getting back at them.
They call it sweet, sweet revenge for a reason, don’t they?
Turns out that label might be a bit overly hyped. » Read more
I’ve been reading your blog for a while. Part of why I’m writing to you is that I’ve loved your articles on breakups. I’m hoping you can help me because I just had the world’s weirdest breakup.
I’d been seeing this guy for a little bit, » Read more
PQ 22.1 — How do I approach the end of my relationships? What do I want from my former partners?
When Being Dumped, I Like Clear-cut Notification I Can Receive in Private that Doesn’t Require a Response
I’m starting to think I’m unusual in this regard. Since I really want only one thing when someone is breaking up with me: I want to know it’s over. » Read more
“I only share when I have no unmet needs that I’m trying to fill. I firmly believe that being vulnerable with a larger audience is only a good idea if the healing is tied to the sharing, not to the expectations I might have for the response I get.”
I Don’t Like to Do Chores in Front of Other People
Like any idiom that’s in common use, » Read more
“I love you,” Skyspook said. “And that’s why if you go back there, back to that house, this relationship is over.”
“Yeah,” Seth said. “You’re not going back there.”
I’d just gotten done telling them (my husband and boyfriend) and two of our friends — Crock and Hilda — about an unfortunate incident with my other partner Rob. » Read more
It is not always by plugging away at a difficulty and sticking to it that one overcomes it; often it is by working on the one next to it. Some things and some people have to be approached obliquely, at an angle.
Closing the Loop
“And this will be the third time I’ve mentioned him,” » Read more
I enjoy and follow your writings and the recent one about how to know your partner is jealous and not just inventing a concern reminded me that I’ve been trying to find some info on how to deal with it when a partner is jealous.
More specifically, how do I not have anxious and guilty feelings, » Read more
“It’s not fair,” they say. “They basically broke up with me out of nowhere. And now they won’t talk to me. I didn’t get my closure.”