PQ 21.7 — Do I let problems in the relationships around me affect me? How do I assert boundaries around problems that aren’t mine?

3 red buckets hanging in a row on a red rack with metal hooks
Image by Tim Green / CC BY

PQ 21.7 — Do I let problems in the relationships around me affect me? How do I assert boundaries around problems that aren’t mine?

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In a piece I wrote earlier in this series on managing boundaries in polyamorous relationship systems, I wrote that one of the trickiest parts of polyamory is determining whether or not what you’re doing affects someone else.  » Read more

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PQ 18.7 — Do I fully understand my partner’s choice to be monogamous or polyamorous, and am I able to accept my partner for who she is?

a signpost with two arrows. The top is green and reads Choice. The bottom is Red and reads choice. The green arrow points left, the red arrows points right.
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

PQ 18.7 — Do I fully understand my partner’s choice to be monogamous or polyamorous, and am I able to accept my partner for who she is?

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Ah! Very interesting. I of course didn’t write this question — these are all questions taken from the seminal polyamory text More than Two,  » Read more

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The Kind of Exhibitionism I’ve Grown Leery Of

an ink drawing of an egg-shaped half-human, half-panda kind of creature wearing a pair of underpants patterned with the same creature all over them
Image by Laura Megumi Thatcher / CC BY

I’ve been on the kink scene formally for about a decade now. And overall, it’s been a very positive experience. I’ve developed relationships (friendly, romantic, and otherwise) that are incredibly important to me. More intimate than most of the ones I’ve forged in the vanilla world. And yet, being on the kink scene hasn’t been without its difficulties.  » Read more

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8 Lessons That I Learned From Both Polyamory and Kink

a fantasy portrait of a woman peering through water or clouds with a contemplative look on her face with both hands placed on her head
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

I didn’t open up my marriage over a decade ago with an eye toward exploring kink. But that’s nonetheless what happened. After about a year of dating polyamorously, I eventually ended up with a girlfriend who knew some folks in the kink scene and had a strong kinky streak herself.

It was a surprising turn of events at the time.  » Read more

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