Running Out of Side Quests on the Quest for Primary

the shadow of what appears to be a man holding a lightning bolt, like the god Zeus
Image by vasse nicolas,antoine / CC BY

“If you asked most people whether they believed in love or not, they’d probably say they didn’t. Yet that’s not necessarily what they truly think. It’s just the way they defend themselves against what they want. They believe in it, but pretend they don’t until they’re allowed to. Most people would throw away all their cynicism if they could.  » Read more

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Polyamory Toolbox: The Good Roommate Standard

2 long-haired black and white cats sitting on a sofa. the one on the left looks sleepy/satisfied, the one on the right is staring straight ahead, with a curious expression on its face
Image by Isaac Wedin / CC BY

When I opened up a relationship that had been monogamous for 8 years, I was prepared to feel jealous. But what I wasn’t prepared for? The radical shift in my thinking about that relationship. We both became much more autonomous. And it was a large adjustment getting used to our increased autonomy.

Prior to discovering polyamory,  » Read more

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