Amatonormativity: (noun) the assumption that a central, exclusive, amorous relationship is normal for humans, in that it is a universally shared goal, and that such a relationship is normative, in the sense that it should be aimed at in preference to other relationship types
We’ve talked many times on this site about amatonormativity. » Read more
In a recent post, I talked about how confusing the conversations we have around love can be. As I wrote then, part of this confusion is because what we call “love” and what another person calls “love” may very well not be the same thing. And it certainly doesn’t help that one person can talk about many different kinds of love, » Read more
I wanted to write to you about your article “The Supernormal Stimulus.” In it, you talk about an approach to optimizing in relationships where you figure out what matters to your partner the most and then you do it. In it, you bring up ways that zoologists were able to trick birds: Geese who think humans are their mothers, » Read more
As I’ve said many times in the past, I don’t do a lot of online dating. I tend to be unconventional in the way I meet partners these days. I chiefly meet folks incidentally through friends or through friends of friends. But I do participate in online dating every so often (albeit rarely, the last time was for a few weeks several years ago), » Read more
PQ 21.6 — Do I have problems that make it difficult for my partners to be with me? How do I seek to mitigate those?
“I think I’m becoming undateable,” I say to my friends.
They argue with me. Tell me that’s not true. They point to my existing two partners as evidence that contradicts this assertion. » Read more
Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.
They previously contributed “I Was Treated as a Disease Vector: Why There Are So Few Gay Men in Pansexual Polyamory” to Poly.Land.
Fluffy’s regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; » Read more
“I’m sorry, but could you hang out just a sec?” I say to him. “I have to go cross-post today’s piece.”
“That’s right, it’s after noon,” he says. “What did you put out for an article today?”
“Oh, it’s a post on amatonormativity. Being single. The hidden cost of art,” » Read more
When I look at beautiful things now, I don’t wonder at the talent that must have produced it. Instead, I think of the stress that it probably took.
What happened behind the scenes? How many nights were spent sleepless? Exactly how heavy was the weight of the artist’s head in their hand?
The most beautiful things in life often come with very hidden and very private costs. » Read more