I ran into a rather cute term a while back: An askhole. What’s an askhole? Well, essentially, it’s what you call a person who asks for your opinion or advice on issues — and then turns around and does the opposite of what you advised.
This is frankly a pretty handy term for me because I’ve run into this a lot. » Read more
It is always happening whenever I talk to my mother.
She’ll say something petty and ungrateful. Someone will have done something nice for her. Something that was clearly well intended. Came from a good place. But because the gesture wasn’t perfect, wasn’t what she would have envisioned in the best of all possible worlds, » Read more
“I am so upset with them,” I say, confiding in a friend.
“What did they do this time?” my friend asks. Because this is far from their first rodeo as far as this long-term friend of mine is concerned. Where once upon a time, we were truly close, there have been a series of unbelievably disappointing occurrences over the past several years. » Read more
After a protracted period of soul searching and agonizing, I decided to share my feelings with him. I thought about how to phrase it. And then I went for it.
And in response he offered, “For one, you feel like that with me, too, and still isn’t true there. For two, not much I could help with except to say that most people like that you’re a bit pushy with your feelings. » Read more
I’ve gotten asked enough times how I started out blogging for a wide audience. I wish I had a better origin story. That I’d gotten bitten by something radioactive. Or that someone swooped down from the sky and knighted me or something.
But it isn’t that colorful.
In all honesty, I was the advice friend. » Read more
Since I’ve been writing for a decent-sized audience for a while now, there’s a certain kind of comment I’m used to receiving.
This happens particularly often whenever I write a post where I offer some advice. A tip or a trick. A novel way to approach communication.
Someone will chime in with, » Read more
First of all I just want to say thank you for your writing. I’ve read both of your books and loved them. I read your blog almost every day. It’s all been so helpful.
Like you I entered polyamory through a previously closed relationship that went on to open up to other partners. » Read more
I’ve been struggling with something for a while now and need advice and support from someone who might understand.
Here’s the situation: I’m married to a vanilla guy I love a lot. He knows I’m a sub and that I have a Domme. I’ve been with my Domme for several years. » Read more
“It’s really easy to find self-help advice nowadays,” she says. “It’s all over the Internet.”
I nod. “Sure is. I even write some myself.”
“That must be a real trip,” she says. “Just putting it out there and seeing how it’s applied.”
“It can be,” I say. “It does help that I don’t know most of my readership personally. » Read more
I’ve been following your writings and came across something in your “Wedding & Exes” piece. I’m looking for a bit of advice.
In that piece, you mentioned a study which says that poly people are more likely to not cut off communication from their exes versus monogamous people. » Read more