The more time passes and I float along the slipstream of my particular happily-ever-after, the more I am impressed with the fact that I was able to be monogamous with a vanilla man (and one with low libido, no less) for 8 years, no easy feat for an oversexed homoflexible kinkster who bonds easily with others. » Read more
I smoothed down the black silk over my full hips, noting the high slit. Good for movement and enticing without being trashy, I decided. The lace had held up well in storage, those months this slip had spent in a kind of time-out, awaiting a weight loss that would allow it to fit again. I adjusted the straps and made sure my breasts lined up in a logical way with the bust area. » Read more
Skyspook: You say you don’t have strong opinions, but you do.
Me: Oh yeah?
Skyspook: It’s because it’s something you value about yourself , that you’re unopinionated, that you don’t have preferences. Even though you do.
It’s interesting what Fetlife does and doesn’t think is important to announce to one’s friends stream. » Read more
My old therapist used to say, “You’re 100% responsible… for your 50%.”
I saw her primarily to get through my divorce. It was a brutal time for me, coping with the promise that I’d broken to myself, that I’d always be with Seth, through everything. The timing of the separation was also unfortunate, » Read more
2011: Michelle is waiting for me at the door as Skyspook pulls the car back out into the street to go to work. She rolls her eyes at me.
“If you’re not fucking him, then what the hell are you doing over there all night?”
I avert my eyes. “Sleeping, for one.”
“You sleep like shit,” she snaps. » Read more
Much has been made recently of gaslighting, and it’s a very important concept to keep track of, boundary policing being of paramount importance especially in those who have multiple relationships. Here’s a good essay on gaslighting: http://www.polyamorousmisanthrope.com/2011/11/02/on-gasslighting/
Briefly: Gaslighting is a form of manipulation in which the target is continually forced to question their own sanity. » Read more
“Emotionally, you’re 90 years old,” my boss says.
It’s one of those weeks, ever increasing in frequency, where I’m frustrated with her for not seeing the big picture, for not thinking ahead of the current decisions and fitting it into future strategy. Acting as if only the present moment exists is a low-pressure state, » Read more
Month one of the re-poly was known as Jankuary.
Month two is hereby christened Fubar-uary.
I’m struggling a bit today but want to log these thoughts for future self, so I doubt this writing will be as tidy as some of my others. The inner turmoil could very well be hormonal, » Read more
“Men are awful,” M said. “If I were you, I’d stick to dating girls.”
“I’ve never dated a girl,” I told him.
“Well, something’s going on,” he observed. “I’ve seen the way you look at them and the way they look at you. Especially when you’re on stage.”
I blushed, » Read more
The first time my ex-husband Seth went to spend the night with his girlfriend, I gave him a hug, told him to have a good time, and closed the apartment door behind him. I spent a minute listening to his footsteps, » Read more