They Like You. They Really, Really Like You.

a photograph of actress Sally Field standing between two unknown gentlemen
Image Source by Alan Light

While I’m a generally sunny person with a positive temperament, I’m not immune to sadness. Self-doubt.

The timing of these slumps can be rather unpredictable. But the negative thoughts I experience? Well, those tend to fall into a few very predictable categories.

And when I’m down on myself, there’s one line of negative thinking that I tend to encounter over and over again: I start to think that no one likes me.  » Read more

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When Dealing With a Manipulative Person, Never JADE

a piece of jadeite jade
Image by James St. John / CC BY

It’s one of the unfortunate realities of interpersonal communication: The way that you talk to people in healthy situations will cause major problems when you’re trying to talk to someone stuck in unhealthy dynamics. That’s because manipulative people with toxic personalities will hijack normal conversational maxims and norms and exploit them to their own ends.  » Read more

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What’s the Difference Between Masochism and Self-Harm?

a question mark
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Hi Page,

I’ve been exploring my more kinky side and I would definitely say I’m a masochist. However, I’ve recently been wondering if I’ve been seeking this out as a new form of self-harm. I used to self-harm in the past and have stopped for a few years, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve just placed the responsibility on someone else.   » Read more

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Ben Franklin Effect, Cognitive Dissonance, and the Subtle Art of Asking for a Favor

It's a surreal graphic of Benjamin Franklin's US currency portrait stretched over a balloon. Behind it is an electric blue landscape
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

If someone does a favor for you, you like them more, right?

But what about the person doing the favor for you? One would expect that you risk making that person feel put out, surely. Inconvenienced. And they might hold having done that favor against you.

But curiously, researchers have found that they don’t.  » Read more

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Can Where You Live Affect How You Love? U.S. Regions & Attachment Style

a map of the united states of america
by Pixabay / CC 0

As I wrote in a previous post, perhaps the biggest lesson of all in child development is that the first year of so of our life is a radically important time for us emotionally. While we continue to learn about trust and social relationships over the course of our life (and experience another notable period of turbulence at puberty),  » Read more

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