What Is Aphantasia?

a blank canvas
Image by Celeste Lindell / CC BY

“I apparently have aphantasia,” I told my friend. “Didn’t know it had a name.”

“Really?!” she said.

“Yeah, I have no visual imagination,” I replied.

“That’s fascinating that you write with that to me,” she said. “Mine is lackluster but not complete lack like aphantasia is.”

I laughed.  » Read more

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The Golden Rule Is for Strangers. Use the Platinum Rule for Those You Know Well.

Image by James St. John / CC BY

Pretty much everyone has heard of The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

It’s in the Bible of course. In there multiple times actually. And it’s also a self-help super hit. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard it in my life. (Likely thousands.)  » Read more

The Golden Rule Is for Strangers.

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When We Get Close to People, We Overestimate How Effectively We Communicate With Them

an artist's rendering of two people. One of them is talking out of 2 mouths. Their conversation partner has their eyes closed and a brick wall textured over their face.
Image by Rick&Brenda Beerhorst / CC BY

“We finish each other’s–”


Arrested Development (and later, Frozen)


It’s kind of the best feeling… when you get close enough to a person that you feel like you know what they’re going to say next. When you can actually accurately finish their sentences.  » Read more

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Sexist Beliefs Are Linked to Dark Triad Personality Traits

it's a weathered graphic that reads "space invaders against sexism" with a retro arcade font. A pixellated alien from the Space Invaders arcade game is also on the sign
Image by PJ Rey / CC BY

We covered the dark triad of personality traits in an earlier installment of this series. Feel free to reread that article for a review. But here’s a recap. Basically, personality researchers wanted to find out if there were traits that could act as early warning signs for antisocial behavior.

After much toil (and warring back and forth with one another),  » Read more

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The First Step in Compromise is *Wanting* to Compromise

a handshake
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Sometimes I write pieces about how people who are coming from different places on something can compromise. Usually, this is in the form of sharing a compromise I made with someone else. A few recent examples of this:

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It’s Important to Remember We Don’t Know What We’re Missing

a brick wall with a brick missing
Image by lamdogjunkie / CC BY

Sometimes the Internet seems like Pandora’s box. It’s easier than ever before for disinformation to spread. It makes the early ages of yellow journalism seem quaint in comparison.

But even as I say this, I can’t deny how many benefits it’s simultaneously presented. Online shopping is hard to ignore, how incredibly helpful it is to be able to get practically anything you’d ever want shipped to you…  » Read more

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When One Partner Wants to Have Important Relationship Discussions Via Text & the Other Wants to Have Them in Person

a manhole that says "communication" on it
Image by Alan Levine / CC BY

“I liked your post today on love languages and meeting in the middle,” she says.

“Thanks,” I say.

“Have you written anything on meeting in the middle when one partner wants to talk about issues via text and the other wants to chat about those things in person?”  » Read more

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