What About the Soft Block?
I used to be a person who responded to everyone who contacted me. Day or night. Regardless of who they were, if I even liked them, how much it inconvenienced me.
Search Results for: recovering people pleaser
When Perspective-Taking Is Too Easy: The Challenge of Staying in Your Own Shoes
It’s easy for me put myself in other people’s shoes. Sometimes — I’d say most of the time — this comes in handy. But other times? Not so much. And it can be tough for me to stay fixed in my own perspective when I need to and to advocate for what I want.
Three Zones: Self, Other, Idealized Other
Once upon a time, I not only had a
double standard but practiced a triple standard, whereby I had one set of standards for myself, a second for others, and a third for idealized others, a.k.a., the pedestal.
When Someone Blows Your Entire “Conflict Budget”
In today’s essay I’m going to talk about something that will make a lot of sense to recovering people pleasers. It will likely make very… Read More »When Someone Blows Your Entire “Conflict Budget”
What Helped Me Recover From Dependent Personality Disorder
HI Page, Your article today about perspecticide was a total game changer. I had no idea what dependent personality disorder was and suddenly all of… Read More »What Helped Me Recover From Dependent Personality Disorder
Growing Up Trying to Be as Little Hassle as Possible
I was a really happy-go-lucky kid. Naturally. But as I grew older, I learned to lean more into this feeling. I took on a willingness… Read More »Growing Up Trying to Be as Little Hassle as Possible
I’ve Always Been a Sucker for a Comeback & It Almost Destroyed Me
There’s a meme that’s been flying around for some time that talks about how kids who were mistreated will learn to love unwanted things. I… Read More »I’ve Always Been a Sucker for a Comeback & It Almost Destroyed Me
There Are So Many Transitions That the Transitions Have Transitions
I’m a recovering people pleaser. There’s no getting around it. As I’ve been working on those issues for nearly a decade and have made an… Read More »There Are So Many Transitions That the Transitions Have Transitions
The Moment When I Realized I Couldn’t Become Impossible to Disappoint
I’m sitting in the midst of yet another week where folks seem hellbent on limboing under my already perilously low expectations. I’ve heard it said… Read More »The Moment When I Realized I Couldn’t Become Impossible to Disappoint
The Middle Path Between Accepting or Rejecting a Difficult Self-Belief Outright Is Testing It
There are lots of important things I was never told about relationships. Not told by popular depictions of course, which are really a strange way… Read More »The Middle Path Between Accepting or Rejecting a Difficult Self-Belief Outright Is Testing It
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