PQ 11.6 — Do I know whether the rules that apply to my relationship are subject to change? If so, who may change them, and how? What input will I have into those changes?
Individual Rules Are Like Mini-Agreements
As I wrote recently, these days I’m a little leery of “rules,” while at the same time understanding how they were absolutely invaluable when I was a brand new poly person. » Read more
“It just isn’t fair,” he says. “I see them falling in love so much faster than we did. This is zero to sixty in seconds, my partner and metamour.”
“Does the speed make you feel like you’re going to be replaced?” I ask.
“No, I’m actually not worried about that,” » Read more
When You Screw Up at the Piano Recital, You Don’t Take a Break from the Keys
“It’s funny if you think about it, that whole ‘you just got out of a relationship, you need to be single for a while’ thing,” Ro says.
We’re at our usual place. I’ve got a glass of red wine. » Read more
“Hey you twoooo!” I say, stepping through the door. I call this greeting out as loudly as I possibly can. Sing-songy in a way that I know will carry into the living room.
The acoustics of my house have long been a vital factor in how Skyspook and I date others separately while living together. » Read more
Dear Lady, he writes.
I see that from time to time you take on submissives. Well, I’m happy to say that today is your lucky day!
More about me: Young able-bodied male with unlimited vitality ready to serve your every whim and desire. My body is your canvas. » Read more
“How are you holding up?” I ask her.
“I’ll be honest with you,” she says. “It’s not good.”
“It’s so strange. I don’t know why it’s affecting me so much. He’s the one that’s going through the breakup. But I feel like I am, too,” she says. » Read more
PQ 11.5 — Do I clearly understand both the letter and the intent of the rules that will apply to my relationship? Am I comfortable maintaining a relationship within those rules? Am I comfortable with the reasons for the rules?
In my time, I’ve known some folks with very brief relationship agreements. » Read more
PQ 11.4 — What will I do if a secondary partner becomes dissatisfied with the rules that apply to them? Am I willing or able to involve that partner in renegotiation of those rules?
As I mentioned in an earlier post, agreements that don’t take the needs of everyone they affect into consideration aren’t ideal. » Read more
“To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved.”
“I hope you have a great time at your party,” CC tells me.
I’m going out of town to visit a cool person I’ve only met one time. But who I’ve been meaning to spend more time with. » Read more
“When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them.”
I look at my phone when we pull into port. » Read more