Advice Friend: Polyamorous Couples Where One Partner Is Ace

a closeup of a shirt that reads "asexuals party hardest"
Image by davidgljay / CC BY

My partner and I are happily married, and have been doing some relationship introspection. Have you ever come across or heard about a successful married relationship where one partner is polyamorous while the other is on the Ace spectrum?

*

A few quick clarifications for readers who might want/need them before I answer today’s question:

Ace/ace = shorthand for asexual

allosexual = not on the asexual spectrum and/or not asexual

Personal disclosure: I am allosexual,  » Read more

Continue Reading

The Moment When I Realized I Couldn’t Become Impossible to Disappoint

someone limboing under a limbo pole while others onlook
Image by Paul Sableman / CC BY

I’m sitting in the midst of yet another week where folks seem hellbent on limboing under my already perilously low expectations.

I’ve heard it said so many times, typically by someone smug and tipping an imaginary or real hat, as they intone words they act like they made up but are just parroting.  » Read more

Continue Reading

What Is Allostatic Load?

a cat with its mouth wide open, displaying its teeth and tongue
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Man, the pandemic… it’s… ugh… it’s a bad time.

Regardless of who you are, whether you’ve got your feet on the ground and are looking at peer-reviewed data or have decided to don some manner of tinfoil hat (of any shape or size), these times are difficult and frustrating.

If you’re one of those folks who think this whole thing is no big deal re: public health (for purposes of disclosure,  » Read more

Continue Reading

It Matters Even More Now That I’m a Klutz. Thanks, Pandemic.

a red sticker that reads "100% KLUTZ CERTIFIED"
Image by Mark Morgan / CC BY

I haven’t written about this much, but I’ll say it now: I’m a klutz.

When I was a little kid, I was always falling down and skinning my knees. Now, I did eventually become a runner, first a sprinter in elementary school and later a cross country runner in middle school (before puberty came along and made it impossible to compete like I had before,  » Read more

Continue Reading