Polyamorous Controversy Over “Benefits”
As readers responded to our recent post 7 Common Myths About Being Polyamorous on social media, one debunked myth quickly emerged as the most controversial:
4. If you have flings, you’re not polyamorous.
Some other folks may feel differently about this, but for me polyamory is about radical openness to whatever happens to develop. » Read more
When many folks think of assertiveness, they think of sender skills. An assertive person is one who communicates their thoughts and feelings confidently. Openly.
And while this is true, it’s not the entire picture. In practice, the most difficult part of assertive communication is the receiver half.
Because an assertive communicator is not only open to speaking their own truths — » Read more
PQ 7.3 — If I hear a hidden meaning in a statement or a question, do I ask for clarification before acting on my assumptions?
This is the 49th PQ installment. Up until now, the chapter-end More than Two questions have been running up to this issue and brushing by it in a dark, » Read more
I glance at my phone. I’m loving the book.
I smile. It’s a message from one of the beta readers for the book I’m putting out soon (slated for early/mid May).
When we set up the beta, we structured it so that readers could give feedback to Skyspook, » Read more
Polyamory has become much more visible in the last few years. While public acceptance and understanding are increasing, a number of misconceptions still persist about being polyamorous. Here are a few common ones:
1. When you’re polyamorous, you’re always looking for new partners.
No. Just because a person is polyamorous, it doesn’t mean they’re in the market for a new relationship. » Read more
The Life and Times of a Failed Sapiosexual
(of a person) finding intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.
a person who finds intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.
early 21st century: from Latin sapiens » Read more
‘wise’ + sexual, on the model of heterosexual and homosexual.
“Ugh,” she says. “More unicorn hunters. I hate unicorn hunters. Don’t they know that no self-respecting bisexual woman is willing to date a couple?”
I bite my tongue yet again, not sure if she remembers that I’ve dated couples. And not just one couple. » Read more
“I could never share my partner,” she says. “I mean, if you really love someone, you want to spend all of your time with them.”
Except it’s not really like that.
Most people can’t spend all of their time together.
It’s very common for monogamous couples to spend time apart. » Read more
It’s a standard piece of dating advice: “Be friends first.”
But it’s not automatically true just because people say it a lot.
Until rather recently I never followed this advice. I thought it inadvisable to be friends first. Maybe even a bit stupid. If I’m physically attracted to someone, why wait to explore that connection? » Read more
PQ 7.2 — What can I do to be more direct in my communication?
The process of moving from an indirect style to a direct style of expressing yourself can feel scary and at times completely overwhelming. But it’s important work. While being indirect can feel more comfortable (especially if we’re used to it), » Read more