We Can’t Actually Do the Most Important Emotional Labor for Others: The Plight of the Unpaid Therapist

a bunch of miniature men on a mining expedition of some giant strawberries, used to represent emotional labor
Image by JD Hancock / CC BY

Emotional Labor, the Plight of the Unpaid Therapist

People have been talking more and more the past few years about emotional labor, the unpaid stress that people acting as caregivers endure by providing emotional support to others. This isn’t limited to just the workplace, however. Women in particular are disproportionately expected in their personal lives (even with strangers) to manage our own emotions in a way that makes whoever we are talking with comfortable,  » Read more

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Buttinski, #1 Metamour, or Compervert? Walking that Fine Line

a closeup image of a hotel key slot with a card inserted. the card reads "privacy please"
Image by hyku / CC BY

Buttinski Sign

Buttinski Sign. It is my Achilles heel. The thing that I find hardest about polyamory.  And it’s never what I’m asked about when people first learn I’m polyamorous. Usually, the most frequently asked question is something like “But don’t you get jealous?” (The answer to that question incidentally is yes occasionally, but not all the time,  » Read more

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PQ 4.7 — In what ways do I protect myself from being hurt? Do those strategies help or hinder my search for connection?

2 images: the top image is a picture of a hand held sideways with a red heart drawn on it. in the bottom picture, the fingers of the hand are spread apart, making it appears asa though the heart from the first image is broken into 4 pieces - text on the palm of the hand in both images says "you make me sick because I adore you so"
Image by xanetia / CC BY

PQ 4.7 — In what ways do I protect myself from being hurt? Do those strategies help or hinder my search for connection?

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I know it’s folly to forever wait for the punch. To flinch against blows that aren’t coming. On the off chance that they might.

And yet,  » Read more

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