It Always Felt Like An Affair

And in hindsight, that should have told me something. “She doesn’t have to know how serious we are yet. She just wouldn’t understand.”

I thought it was romantic that he would lie to her by omission. That we’d have little secrets that only the two of us would know. I thought they were harmless and bred intimacy.  » Read more

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About the Other Night

The spirit is the energy that moves between us, one to the other. When we struggle, fight, collapse together, we unearth our depths. I am actually located at the depth to which I attach to myself. This is where I attach to you, interlocking seamlessly. We can imagine it as a projection, if we stop to imagine all those details that were never explained,  » Read more

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Sincerity

I was at a backyard bonfire party many years ago when I saw a friend vigorously fellate a hot dog. I know. No big deal, right? You might be wondering why I remember something so mundane.

The trouble was that my friend was asexual to the point of being sex negative and despised giving head.  » Read more

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Mono-Flexible

This is the term Skyspook came up with to describe myself with regards with monogamy/non-monogamy.

I think my natural orientation is for monogamy, the simplicity. I am very sensitive, tend to get obsessed with romantic partners, and am easily satisfied.

At the same time, I am able to be polyamorous, have the skill set for managing multiple relationships and dealing with insecurities,  » Read more

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Weighty Matters

a person in a blue bikini, leading another person across a sandy beach

Dieting has been very much a part of my psyche since I first started going to Weight Watchers meetings at 3 years old. I found the brochures exquisite, color-coded, graduating through a program whose logical progression appeased my young brain’s need for order. They were the first thing I read. While my mother made copious notes on a legal pad,  » Read more

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Yes, I’m the Crazy Ex

I have a bounty of exes, ex-girlfriends, ex-boyfriends, now even an ex-husband.

In short, I’m a lot of people’s crazy ex.

I love so hard it hurts.

I spent my childhood terribly lonely. I was out in the country, far from my school friends. The other members of my household found me obnoxious and weird,  » Read more

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I wrote a story

Yesterday I did something I haven’t done in a long time. I wrote a short story. Fiction and I haven’t been on speaking terms in quite some time. Not that fiction “speaks” per se (though a case could be made if one were so inclined), but you know what I mean. I was trying to figure it out today.  » Read more

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Acceptance is Scary

“Thank you,” I gasp, collapsing beside him on the bed.

He raises an eyebrow, even though his face is flooded with afterglow. “Thank you.”

It is a dream to be so savored, to have my perversion welcomed, to sleep bundled by warm arms, to be asked what’s wrong, invited to discuss my troubles,  » Read more

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Wish List

Our psychological and emotional positions in the sadomasochist realm firmly established, I’d broached the topic of D/s. I wanted to know where we were going.

“Well, what do you want?” he asked me.

It was a simple question, but for some reason I found myself unable to answer him. I find this to be the case when I care too much about what I’m about to say—I clam up,  » Read more

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