Vagueposting Has Really Become an Inescapable Cultural Expectation

a tuft of smoke
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

vagueposting: (noun) making posts on social media that either

  1. Give off a vague feeling of sadness or other emotional issues to prompt others into asking what’s wrong and generally shower said poster with attention
  2. Talk smack about someone without mentioning them.

(definition source: urban dictionary)

I Work On a Time Delay

A long while back,  » Read more

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For Better or Worse, You Don’t Get to Control How Other People See You

a closeup of a pair of glasses
Image by Brett Bolkowy / CC BY

I’m sitting in a pew, attending mass at the church I attended growing up.

It’s been 7 years since I went to a service here, on another visit to my hometown, but surprisingly little has changed since then.

Actually, surprisingly little has changed from 30 years ago, when I was a small child doing my best to remain quiet and tolerate the unending boredom,  » Read more

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The World Needs More Atypical Writers

a haphazardly piled stack of 7 pencils in various colors
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

People make a lot of assumptions about you when you have a large platform. Especially when you’re just starting to break through.

You get the strangest comments from people, ones that clearly assume things about your personality and intention for writing that aren’t in the pieces themselves. That are instead drawn from people’s opinions of what writers who have grown popular must be like personality-wise.  » Read more

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The Very Presence of a Community and Other Voices Can Be Reassuring, Regardless of What They’re Even Saying

a map of various cartoon busts of people connected with a series of dotted lines, like a social network in pictographic form
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

It’s been interesting, the past decade. Polyamory went from being a relatively obscure term, something that was only discussed in low-tech ancient discussion groups that looked basically like .txt files posted by a few obsessive outliers, to being covered by major news outlets. (The history of this emergence is well covered by Alan M’s blog Polyamory in the News)

While people disagree on whether consensual non-monogamy has caught on as a practice during that time (some people say no,  » Read more

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The Kind of Self-Help That Sneaks Up On You

a stack of books and an e-reading device
Image by Hobbies on a Budget / CC BY

I’m a big reader. Have been ever since I learned how. I grew up reading primarily fiction. It was the same through my teens and into my mid 20s. Fiction and loads of it.

And then, somewhere along the line, I stopped reading fiction. If I had to guess when it happened, I can look back at my back-to-back experiences prepping for two separate careers (after the changing economy snatched one away): the first involved cramming medical terminology into my skull;  » Read more

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When You’ve Changed, You Have to Decide Whether to Accept It or Try to Force Yourself Back

a ranch in North Texas. Wide blue open sky with few clouds. A windmill. Prairie grass. A fence.
Image by Aaron Stidwell / CC BY

Two months ago, I moved from Cleveland to Dallas. I laughed the first time I was asked if I might be amenable to moving to Texas five months ago.

But the more I learned about the job opportunity in Dallas, the less insane it sounded.

And a month after that, I was straight out getting rid of most of what I owned,  » Read more

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