There are four children in my family. I have two older sisters and a younger brother, making me the third of four kids in the birth order. And quite importantly in an old school Catholic family that exalts sons above daughters and considers sons more capable and skilled, I’m the youngest girl in my family. » Read more
Dumped & Depressed: “You Wouldn’t Leave Someone With Cancer,” He Said.
“You wouldn’t leave someone with cancer,” he said.
She blinked, not quite sure she was hearing what she was hearing. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“You’re breaking up with me because I have depression,” he said. “That’s wrong. Not only is it wrong, it’s cruel. I never thought you were someone who would do something like that. » Read more
Grief Is Idiosyncratic & Bounces Like a Ball in a Box
There are a few things about grief that I wish I had known a long time ago. Before the losses started and I was forced to make sense of it all.
And failed miserably.
These days, I’m much more comfortable with grief. Not that anyone ever wishes it on anyone else — » Read more
In Dark Times, I Live for the Unexpectedly Cool Discovery & to See What Happens Next
It was a dark morning in Cleveland in the fall of 2016 when a trust fund baby and bully came from behind to win the highest office in the land.
I had only slept about three hours and fitful ones at that. My partner had gone to bed long before, but I’d been idly watching election results on my phone as I sat in the living room, » Read more
It’s Going to Hurt Over and Over Again Before It Gets Better
I’m sorry it hurts right now.
The wound is fresh. And while I wish there were some way that I could just make the pain go away, I can’t.
No one can.
It’s going to hurt you every time you think of it. Sometimes this will happen at weird moments. » Read more
If I Told You That Life Had No Purpose, How Would You Feel?
If I told you that life had no purpose, how would you feel? Would you feel crushed? Or would you feel free?
For me, it all depends on the day. On whatever river of emotions I’m currently floating down.
Sometimes I’m gripped with sadness at this idea. With the realization that there’s no way to win at the game I’m playing. » Read more
When You’re Young, They Dismiss You Because You Don’t Have Enough Experience
When you’re young, they dismiss you because you don’t have enough experience.
What do you know? they say. You haven’t been through anything. You have to live to learn. To do to know.
You can’t just spring out of the womb wise. Fully formed like Athena was when she was born from Zeus’s head. » Read more
Is There a Difference Between Natural and Affected Extroversion?
As I wrote in a recent post, I recently moved cross country and have discovered that in spite of my assumption that I’d rush out and get socially connected ASAP that I am very introverted in my new home.
Happily introverted.
It’s a sharp 180 from my normal way of relating. » Read more
Helping People Learn to Crochet During Nuclear Winter
“Look at the bright side,” I say to him. “When Roe v. Wade is overturned, you’ll be a hot piece of ass with your vasectomy and all.”
He cracks a smile. Chuckles. “You’re terrible,” he says.
“Maybe,” I say, “But you laughed.”
“I did indeed.”
It’s maybe not the best way to deal with the feeling that the world is ending any day now. » Read more
When You’ve Changed, You Have to Decide Whether to Accept It or Try to Force Yourself Back
Two months ago, I moved from Cleveland to Dallas. I laughed the first time I was asked if I might be amenable to moving to Texas five months ago.
But the more I learned about the job opportunity in Dallas, the less insane it sounded.
And a month after that, I was straight out getting rid of most of what I owned, » Read more