“I’ve definitely had attractions to other women,” she says. “Had sex with them, sure. But I’ve never really dated one.”
I grip my coffee cup in my hands more tightly, feeling the warmth of the drink spread through my fingers. I idly think that she’d be a good girlfriend. She’s pretty, » Read more
“Are you all set with that?” the bartender asks.
It takes me a second to even register what she means. I look down. There’s a black leather check holder on the bar. Partially obscured by my glass.
“Oh! Oh,” I say. “Sorry. I didn’t even see it.”
My girlfriend Ro looks at me. » Read more
Skyspook and I have been charting my polyamorous web chart for the second book (Update: it’s out!). A map of my current relationship system, with all of my partners’ partners and so on. Taken as a whole, it looks hopelessly complicated.
But it never feels that way. These days it’s a pretty stable system. » Read more
Today’s guest post is from LH, a poly, kinky, queer lady, who identifies as a lesbian. She feels lucky to have found a primary partner who is sweet and loving and makes her feel valued, and a secondary partner whose steady support is a foundation for her. She has been challenged and grown a lot safely, » Read more
Can anyone remember love? It’s like trying to summon up the smell of roses in a cellar. You might see a rose, but never the perfume.
I leave Ro’s, my entire body thrumming. Still smelling her perfume.
We’ve been talking about nonhormonal contraception. Harry Chapin’s songs. » Read more
I’m thinking about Charlie Howard again. Although queer kids from Maine don’t really stop thinking about him.
If you’ve read Stephen King’s It (or watched the miniseries from the 90’s), you may be familiar with the scene where teenagers throw a gay man into the river.
But it’s not just a horrific scene. » Read more
Mono/poly relationships (i.e., pairings in which one partner is monogamous and the other is polyamorous) are famously difficult.
While there are many factors, we do ourselves no favors by viewing monogamy and polyamory as polar opposites rather than as points on the same spectrum.
Consider this: It’s difficult to find a workable middle between two things if you’re convinced that one can’t possibly exist. » Read more
The Life and Times of a Failed Sapiosexual
(of a person) finding intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.
a person who finds intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.
early 21st century: from Latin sapiens » Read more
‘wise’ + sexual, on the model of heterosexual and homosexual.
My wife and I opened our marriage a while ago. Well, opened it at least in theory. We haven’t found anybody yet. Maybe it’s because we live in a conservative area with a lot of religious people, but it’s really been hard finding a woman to date us both (I’m straight, » Read more
“What prompted the ‘biphobic’ comment from a reader?” they ask me.
I laugh. “That was several months ago. It was in response to this post. I admit in the piece I was near the line, and I knew it would be controversial. I was encouraged by several other queer people to write it because they wanted to but feared the backlash.” » Read more