Queer “Tourism,” “Safe” Flirting & Straight Women at Strip Clubs: When Allies Endanger Queer People With Their Lack of Understanding

a closeup of a person wearing rainbow sunglasses. The reflection of a group of people waiting to cross the street can be seen in them.
Image by Karen Roe / CC BY

Today’s article is a guest post by LadyHeat.

LadyHeat is a badass lesbian bitch who kicks in the teeth of marginalization. Her geeky interests are many and include comics, gaming, and dreaming of being a lady-romancing space pirate.

Today’s post is her third article for Poly Land. She previously contributed:

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The Conversations You Have When You’re Semi-Demisexual

a photo of a half-moon
Image by Prabhakar Banerjee / CC BY

He takes a while to get to know people before he feels comfortable with them. And when he does, he doesn’t want to jump right into bed. He wants to make sure you’re both comfortable with one another. That there’s an emotional connection first.

He’s had it up to here with a culture that links sex and disrespect.  » Read more

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There *Are* Asexual Polyamorous People, You Know

it's the asexual flag, which is 4 horizontal stripes, top to bottom colors: black, gray, white, purple
Image by Public Domain (simple geometry) / PD

A lot of people assume that this idea that polyamory is about having loving, committed relationships is all a bunch of hooey.

Secretly, they argue, deep down inside, all polyamorists are looking for is sex. It’s about the sex. The ease of having more access to greater sexual variety. And the ability to have super adventurous experiences like orgies.  » Read more

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In Order to Be Polyamorous, I Had to Get Over the Idea That It’d Make Me a Bad Bisexual

the landscape of a rocky alien planet. The sky is blue, but there are two moons in it.
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

I Kept Having the Same Two Conversations, Over and Over Again

Growing up bisexual, I’d end up in an unpleasant conversation every time I told a new partner my sexual orientation. And it usually went one of the following ways:

Conversation #1: 

Them: Oh, you’re bi? Next thing I know, you’ll be telling me you need to have a boyfriend/girlfriend,  » Read more

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Polyamory Helped Me Find a Community of Other Bisexual People

It's the bisexual flag. Three horizontal stripes, going from top to bottom: Pink, purple, blue.
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

As I’ve written before, unlike a lot of other polyamorous educators, I wasn’t someone who always knew I was polyamorous. Indeed, I considered myself quite a monogamous person growing up. Even now, I think of myself as being more ambiamorous than anything else, able to happily practice either polyamory or monogamy,  » Read more

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What It Was Like Growing Up Bisexual & Being the First Girl In My Class to Develop

a photo of two people. The one on the left is cosplaying as Jessica Rabbit with orange hair, a red strapless gown with a high leg slit and purple gloves. The woman standing next to her on the right is dressed in a flowered shirt and cardigan
Image by Kay Pike / CC BY

I remember standing in the movie theater staring at a game I couldn’t take my eyes off. It was there, wedged in between the spiral wishing well funnel you dropped coins into and what was essentially a glorified mood ring, where you’d press as hard as you could, and it would tell you how stressed you were —  » Read more

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