To Make Mono/Poly Easier, View Monogamy and Polyamory as a Spectrum, Not a Binary

A venn diagram up above a cityscape. One of the circles says "yes," the other says "no." The overlap between the two is labeled "me."
Image by Terminals & Gates / CC BY

Mono/poly relationships (i.e., pairings in which one partner is monogamous and the other is polyamorous) are famously difficult.

While there are many factors, we do ourselves no favors by viewing monogamy and polyamory as polar opposites rather than as points on the same spectrum.

Consider this: It’s difficult to find a workable middle between two things if you’re convinced that one can’t possibly exist.  » Read more

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When Sex is Cancelled Because You Cry Out Philosophers’ Names in Bed

A surrealist image. A lightning storm rages on against a background of dark clouds. In the foreground are 3 dress forms, but their base is shaped by a tree-like structure, roots or dendrites (of neurons). On these 3 shapes are 3 suits and ties and a floating hat. Under the leftmost hat is a Rubik's cube in the process of being solved. Under the middle hat is a lightbulb. The rightmost hat covers a Rubik's cube that appears to be bursting into light.
Image / CC 0

The Life and Times of a Failed Sapiosexual



  1. (of a person) finding intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.


  1. a person who finds intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.

early 21st century: from Latin sapiens  » Read more
‘wise’ + sexual, on the model of heterosexual and homosexual.

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Sexual Fluidity: Sailing Polyamory Through Uncharted Waters

a large galleon (old-fashioned ship with 2 large masts) is docked at a harbor
Image by Rob Bixby / CC BY

“What prompted the ‘biphobic’ comment from a reader?” they ask me.

I laugh. “That was several months ago. It was in response to this post. I admit in the piece I was near the line, and I knew it would be controversial. I was encouraged by several other queer people to write it because they wanted to but feared the backlash.”  » Read more

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So You Think You’re Hypersexual: Living Up to the Hype

large balloon letters of blue graffiti paint that read "hype" on a gray wall of a building
Image by Big Ed Mustapha / CC BY

Hype Is Short for Hypersexual

Hey there, I’m hype. That’s short for hypersexual.

You may be familiar with folks who are ace, which is short for asexual. Asexuality awareness has really taken off in recent years, which is a fantastic thing. In basic terms, people who are asexual have no sexual feelings or desire.  » Read more

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