When Sex Positivity Is Rape Culture With a Bow On It

a photograph of a cat with a bow on its head with an uncomfortable expression on its face
Image by JoshBerglund19 / CC BY

Content Warning: Sex Positivity as Coercion

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Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.

This is the seventh article they’ve contributed to Poly.Land (wow!). Here are the others:

  1. I’m Too Anxious to Be Jealous
  2. Everything I’ve Ever Learned About Non-Monogamy My Puppy Taught Me All Over Again 
  3. Is There a Right Time or Way to Break Up a Relationship?
  4.   » Read more

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Why It’s Tempting to Fake Orgasms, But You Really Shouldn’t

a jar full of dozen of yardsticks, viewed from above
Image by Bill Smith / CC BY

“Let’s see how many orgasms I can give you,” he says. “My previous record is nine in one night. But I’d like to try and top that.”

I stiffen. He isn’t talking about me when he references his record. Whether he realizes it or not, he’s implied that I’m in sexual competition with some unknown mystery woman.  » Read more

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How Are We Supposed to Really Understand Sex If We’re Not Comfortable Talking About It?

a black background with white lettering. The words read "Censored"
Image by Guerretto / CC BY

It’s happy hour at the bar with Skyspook’s coworkers. I’m his designated driver and feeling a bit out of place as a plus one. Most of the people there I’m meeting for the first time, and they’re nice enough, so I do my best to chat with them.

I’m relieved when Skyspook’s boss walks up to me since we’ve met in the past and talked before.  » Read more

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Proxic: Toxic by Proxy

a black and white photo of a sign with triangle with an exclamation point in it at the top. Then there is a single solid line under it. Finally on the bottom, it reads "hazardous waste"
Image by Kevin Doncaster / CC BY

When Sweetness Is the Whole Problem

“I feel bad about being so upset with her,” she says. “She hasn’t really done anything wrong herself.”

I nod. “I was really surprised to hear you were having trouble with her. She’s so sweet. Not the sort of person I would ever imagine getting under your skin.”  » Read more

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