When You Move Away From Trying to Be Right All the Time & Focus on Learning Instead

a small green plant growing up from ground covered by dead leaves
Image by Adam Selwood / CC BY

I can remember it clearly, the pressure to be right all the time.

Grade school, junior high, high school. It was all the rage. Especially in my group of friends.

I hung out with the “smart” kids. Girls (mostly) who took advanced placement courses, read for fun. Had unusual talents and interests.  » Read more

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What You’re Like When You Achieve Your Full Potential, According to Experts

a person standing on a mountain peak at sunset
Image by postscapes / CC BY

In 1943, Abraham Maslow introduced his hierarchy of needs in his paper A Theory of Motivation. According to his hierarchy, human beings are motivated by a number of different needs, but some are more basic than others. If those basic needs aren’t met first, then a person will not have the opportunity or drive to work towards ones higher up in the hierarchy.  » Read more

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Turn Down the Heat on Difficult People by Staying Medium Chill

a picture of a glass with ice cubes in it with water being poured on top. The photo is blue and purple tinted
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

A while back, I wrote an article on one of my favorite tools in the quest of maintaining my sanity: The gray rock method.

The gray rock method can be an emotional lifesaver in situations where you’re forced to interact with a manipulative person. Especially one who is good at laying conversational traps and kicking up drama out of nowhere.  » Read more

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People Often Don’t Know Why They Believe Things But Will Come Up With a Reason Anyway

person in a Spider-man costume on the riding an elephant statue
Image by Jessie Pearl / CC BY

While the study of the nuts and bolts of the human mind is still arguably in its infancy, people have been observing and arguing about human behavior for centuries. Empirical social science is relatively new (with the earliest formal studies only going back to the 19th century) but has managed to make a dizzying number of discoveries and exciting insights about human nature —  » Read more

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The Drunk and Sober Versions of You Have Different Memory Banks

a scuba diver under the water
Image by Heath Alseike / CC BY

“Things’ll fall together eventually,” I say. “Just gotta keep on… shit, how did you put it?”

He cocks his head in the way he does when he’s listening to the question but doesn’t know exactly what I’m asking him.

“I want to say ‘keep on grinding,’” I continue. “But I know you don’t like that expression.”  » Read more

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It’s Easy to Underestimate the Number of Pro-Polyamory Monogamous People Out There

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Image by Anssi Koskinen / CC BY

The vast majority of people don’t worry much at all about getting into a car. Like a lot of other people, I myself have been known to do it multiple times in the same day. I’ve headed out to work, to the store, to home, and then later left go on a date before driving back home after.  » Read more

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“You’re So Cute I Just Wanna Eat You Up”

it's a 4-panel of a cute cartoon volcano. In the first panel, volcano is slightly smiling. Panel 2: they are smiling with their mouth in an upside down W and their eyes closed. In the third panel, they seem to be slightly alarmed as smoke flows out of them. In the fourth, they are blowing up with lava.
Image by Licenciada Cantinas / CC BY

Sometimes people say really weird things when they hold babies.

For starters, there’s nonsensical baby talk. Goo goos and gaa gaas. All that.

And then there are the observations grown adults will sometimes make that sound, well, frankly a little more hostile or angry than they do happy: “You’re so cute I want to eat you up.”   » Read more

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It’s Harder to Walk Away From Something That Isn’t Working Out When You’ve Already Invested A Lot In It

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Image by Viktor-G / CC BY

If her doubts had started on her wedding day, I probably would have called them cold feet.

But they didn’t.

She started wanting to back out a full six months before the wedding.

“This sounds really serious,” I’d tell her. “What are you going to do?”

“What can I do?”  » Read more

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