It all stems from a joke on the TV show How I Met Your Mother. Character Barney Stinson points out that when women sit in groups that they all seem more attractive than if they were sitting alone. He calls this the Cheerleader Effect and likens it to how a squad of cheerleaders look gorgeous mid-routine but comparatively plain Jane alone. » Read more
Yes, Forcing Yourself to Smile Actually Does Make You Feel a Little Better
My grandma once told me that if you’re sad that you should just put on bright lipstick and smile.
Her reasoning was more about self-protection than anything else. She said that people would be too busy looking at your lipstick to notice your sadness.
And so you’d avoid the most dreadful states of all: Pity. » Read more
Shooting the Messenger: When You Tell People Bad News, They Like You Less
It can be tough when you have a difficult message to deliver. Especially unpleasant news.
I’ve definitely been in situations when I had to be the one to deliver bad news and then promptly had my head bitten off by the recipient — even in situations where I didn’t do anything and all of the action involved third parties! » Read more
Huh. Being Able to Describe Negative Emotions Might Protect Against Depression.
Like a lot of other people, I grew up in a house where we didn’t really discuss emotions at all — and certainly not negative emotions.
In fact, it wasn’t until I was in my 30s that I was good at differentiating between them and expressing them clearly. I’d learned that you said you were “mad” » Read more
Yikes! Apparently A Third of Women Have Dated Men Just for the Free Food.
As I wrote in the last installment of this series, science’s role is to test hypotheses and uncover the truth. Sometimes this uncovered truth is surprising. Other times it’s a big duh, “Well thanks for the info, Captain Obvious” kind of moment.
Frankly, reality doesn’t care as much about our biases as we do. » Read more
Couples Who Communicate More About Sex Have Better Sex
Science’s role is to test hypotheses and uncover the truth. Sometimes this uncovered truth is surprising. Other times it’s a big duh, “Well thanks for the info, Captain Obvious” kind of moment.
Frankly, reality doesn’t care as much about our biases as we do.
Today’s study falls into the Duh Bucket for me. » Read more
One Little Word We Use, Or Don’t, Can Provide Hints About Our Attachment Style
As I’ve written in previous posts, perhaps the biggest lesson of all in child development is that the first year of so of our life is a radically important time for us emotionally. While we continue to learn about trust and social relationships over the course of our life (and experience another notable period of turbulence at puberty), » Read more
Yes, You Probably DO Have a “Type”
Have you ever emerged from a very difficult relationship, swearing off ever dating someone like that again, only to find yourself later gravitating towards people who share a lot in common with your ex?
I sure have. And at that point, it becomes a mental wrestling match where I weigh the pros and cons and try to remind myself that people can have similar characteristics and yet not carry the same baggage or engage in the same difficult behaviors. » Read more
Why Public Figures Who Say Homophobic Things Are So Often Caught Having Gay Sex
At this point, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched a public figure who’s vehemently homophobic end up getting nabbed in the act of having gay sex. Typically somewhere wildly inappropriate, too. Like at their office. Or in a public restroom.
Places you really shouldn’t be having sex, even if you aren’t being a giant hypocrite who says TEH GAY IS EVIL. » Read more
When You Know Something But Can’t Remember Where You Learned It
My friend is talking to me about a study with interesting findings.
“Oh wow,” I say. “That sounds really cool.” I tell them if they could send it over to me that would be great.
“Sure,” they say. But then add, “Actually, I’m not sure where I heard about it.”
We spend the next several minutes seeing if they can give me some more details. » Read more