I’ve written quite a few times on this website about attachment styles. As I’ve written in those previous posts, perhaps the biggest lesson of all in child development is that the first year of so of our life is a radically important time for us emotionally. While we continue to learn about trust and social relationships over the course of our life (and experience another notable period of turbulence at puberty), » Read more
It doesn’t happen very often, but every once in a great while, I fall so deeply in love with someone or something that I don’t care if it loves me back.
It happened with you, you know. I was convinced that you were too good for me. That I didn’t deserve someone like you. » Read more
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I was a jerk.”
“It’s okay,” I say. “I don’t think you’re a jerk. I didn’t like what you said, but I’m glad you’ve apologized.”
He smiles. “I’m going to work on not snapping like that in the future. Not saying something hurtful I don’t mean.”
“Thank you,” » Read more
It’s dark. We’ve been up later than we should be, considering you have regular banker’s hours to contend with. I’ve heard you settle into your routine. Your breathing changes like it always does as you slip into sleep.
I’m reading a book on my Kindle. I have the screen brightness turned way down, » Read more
“So what do you do for a living?” they asked me.
“I’m a writer,” I said.
“Ohhh,” they replied. “What sorts of things do you write?”
Everyone always asks this question. It’s interesting to me how reliable this is. Back when I held a variety of other jobs, I found that followup questions were rare. » Read more
Pretty much everyone has heard of The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
It’s in the Bible of course. In there multiple times actually. And it’s also a self-help super hit. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard it in my life. (Likely thousands.) » Read more
The Golden Rule Is for Strangers.
Sometimes I write pieces about how people who are coming from different places on something can compromise. Usually, this is in the form of sharing a compromise I made with someone else. A few recent examples of this:
I remember the first time I ever stuck up for you for a simple reason: Because it was easy. It was the right thing to do.
But at the time, you were really surprised that I’d do that for you. You told me you weren’t used to other people sticking up for you. » Read more
Sometimes the Internet seems like Pandora’s box. It’s easier than ever before for disinformation to spread. It makes the early ages of yellow journalism seem quaint in comparison.
But even as I say this, I can’t deny how many benefits it’s simultaneously presented. Online shopping is hard to ignore, how incredibly helpful it is to be able to get practically anything you’d ever want shipped to you… » Read more
When One Partner Wants to Have Important Relationship Discussions Via Text & the Other Wants to Have Them in Person
“I liked your post today on love languages and meeting in the middle,” she says.
“Thanks,” I say.
“Have you written anything on meeting in the middle when one partner wants to talk about issues via text and the other wants to chat about those things in person?” » Read more