I got my start with courting women by comforting one who’d had her heart broken.
The surroundings were far from ideal, not anyone’s idea of romantic. I’d spotted a small figure curled up in a bathroom stall. Sobbing because the boy she liked had gone off with one of my friends instead.
But I climbed in beside her, » Read more
I recently published a piece called “There *Are* Asexual Polyamorous People, You Know.” That article attracted a lot of attention and resulted in many comments and private messages. For the most part, its reception was very positive. I heard from a bunch of folks who were happy to see some ace representation, » Read more
In 2008 I became obsessed with Myers-Briggs. For those who haven’t heard of it, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality test that gives you a 4-letter result. Each letter is a different binary that represents a dimension of personality.
The first letter of a Myers-Briggs result is either E for Extroversion or I for Introversion. » Read more
“I have this one friend who’s always getting on me for having an open marriage,” she says.
“Been there,” I say.
“Really?” she says. “What happened?”
“With just that one friend or the others?”
“There was more than one?” she asks.
“Of course. » Read more
Unfortunately, there’s no shortage of people who will judge you based on what your partner does — or doesn’t do.
I noticed this when I first got married. I’d fallen in love with my husband for a number of reasons. An unflappable sense of confidence, a warm sense of humor, a kind of charm that’s difficult for me even now to explain. » Read more
It’s dating advice that I’ve probably gotten a thousand times. “Play it cool.”
Even if you like someone, even if you like them an awful lot, you’re supposed to downplay how much. Especially when that relationship is new.
I’ve heard it over and over again.
Furthermore, a lot of people say, » Read more
When I was younger, I was always envious of my friends with nerdy mothers. Mothers who took an interest in learning. Read for pleasure and edification.
When I’d come home from school, and my mother would ask me about my day, I’d tell her, but she’d quickly tune out. While I was geeking out about history or long division or whatever thing I was excited about (I loved school as a little kid), » Read more
My husband Justin is the kind of person who doesn’t like it when you read things aloud to him. When given the choice, he nearly always prefers to read the words himself. Similarly, he’s not someone who often stands and reads things aloud.
So when he started roaring with laughter and insisted he had to read something to me, » Read more
I was teaching a class a while back on an unrelated topic when a student interjected with an observation. The Love Languages framework is arguably one of the most popular and widely understood relationship models these days (and I write about it myself from time to time), so it was no surprise when they brought it up. » Read more
“You guys aren’t married, are you?” our cab driver asks us.
“Actually we are,” I say.
“Newlyweds?” he asks.
“We’ve been together eight years,” I answer.
“Wow,” he says. “You don’t act married.”
“What do you mean?”
Our car driver tells us that we seem to get along too well, » Read more