PQ 25.6 — If I am thinking of staying closeted, is it because I face genuine and serious risks, or am I concerned about being inconvenienced or losing status?

it's a photograph of a person with long hair who is wearing a ski hat, a winter coat, and mittens. They have their hands covering their face, as though they are embarrassed
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

PQ 25.6 — If I am thinking of staying closeted, is it because I face genuine and serious risks, or am I concerned about being inconvenienced or losing status?

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Fear is a funny thing. Often it’s very binary, when you feel fear. You get that worry, that pit in your stomach.  » Read more

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PQ 25.5 — What risks do I face — including personal, professional, or physical — in being public about my polyamorous relationships? Are these risks I can afford to take?

5 colorful shacks on a beach. Colors, from left to right: Yellow, green, blue, pinkish-purple, and red
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

PQ 25.5 — What risks do I face — including personal, professional, or physical — in being public about my polyamorous relationships? Are these risks I can afford to take?

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The decision whether to come out or not is a deeply personal one. In my own case, I’ve been out for many years,  » Read more

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PQ 25.3 — Who in my life is important for me to be able to talk to about my relationships? Whom do I think it’s important for my partners to meet?

clothes hanging in a closet
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PQ 25.3 — Who in my life is important for me to be able to talk to about my relationships? Whom do I think it’s important for my partners to meet?

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“You know,” my mother says. “I really wish your brother would bring one of his girls home.”

“I guess he’s not at an emotional place where he wants to do that,”  » Read more

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PQ 25.2 — Do I feel like I have friends I can discuss relationship problems with who will not blame polyamory as the problem?

3 long-haired women are lying on the grass. with their heads together
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PQ 25.2 — Do I feel like I have friends I can discuss relationship problems with who will not blame polyamory as the problem?

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In my line of work, I get asked certain questions over and over again. This is understandable since while no two people are exactly alike, we do share a lot in common with each other (often more than we realize).  » Read more

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PQ 25.1 — Do I have access to a social support system that is friendly to and knowledgeable about polyamory?

3 friendly-looking light brown dogs just sitting around outside relaxing
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PQ 25.1 — Do I have access to a social support system is friendly to and knowledgeable about polyamory?

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My discovery that polyamory could be a viable way for people to do relationships and my very first polyamorous relationship happened quite close together, for a very simple reason: The friend who introduced me to the idea when coming out to me as polyamorous also dated me very soon afterwards.  » Read more

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PQ 24.6 — Is there anything about this person I’m hoping will change?

a busted up outhouse in the mojave desert
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PQ 24.6 — Is there anything about this person I’m hoping will change?

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As I wrote in another recent installment of this series, I grew up as essentially a social chameleon. A person who could get along with a wide variety of people. And blending in was an attitude that followed me into the way that I had romantic and sexual relationships,  » Read more

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PQ 24.5 — Is this person available to give me what I think I want in the relationship — in terms of time, emotional intimacy, and freedom for the relationship to grow?

a closeup of a bloom on a flowering cactus
Image by Wilferd Duckitt / CC BY

PQ 24.5 — Is this person available to give me what I think I want in the relationship — in terms of time, emotional intimacy, and freedom for the relationship to grow?

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As I look at today’s question, I think it’s one that perhaps people these days are more likely to ask of me.  » Read more

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