I need some help finding an online support group. Can you help me? Do you have a master list of polyamory groups?
I get at least one message that asks this question a week. Typically, I will walk them through more or less what I’m about to write in today’s post. » Read more
I am pretty new to poly. I’ve only started exploring it in the last six months or so. I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog, and found your advice very helpful when navigating some of the trickier points of managing multiple relationships. Thank you for that! Lately I’ve been encountering a new problem, » Read more
While jealousy may be a very strong emotional signal, it’s not a very specific one. As I’ve written before, it’s easy to panic when you experience jealousy, but it’s very much like a check engine light: Jealousy tells you that something is amiss but not what, exactly. And certainly how serious the issue is or how to really fix it. » Read more
I’ve been poly for about 6 months. I recently met a new partner. He has another partner (and so do I). He asked me to get testing for STIs before we sleep together. I was so offended! Why would he do that? A big part of poly for me has been accepting myself as a sexual being. » Read more
“Ugh,” I say.
“You okay?” he says.
“Yeah, my neck just hurts.” I rub the sore muscle, frowning. “No biggie. It happens sometimes.”
“Oh, mind if I help you with that?” he asks. “I can do a release.”
I’ve seen his training certificate on the wall. That he knows what he’s doing when it comes to massage therapy. » Read more
We’ve all been there. Driving down the road. Minding your own damn business. Just trying to get where you need to go — when the check engine light comes on.
It could be anything. Something easy to fix like a loose gas cap. Or it could be something far more serious. » Read more
It’s usually one of first things you’re asked when someone finds out that you’re polyamorous: “But don’t you get jealous?” I get asked it a lot. And one of the most important realizations I had was that jealousy isn’t really an emotion.
If anything, jealousy is a system of emotions. » Read more
In “Poly Road Testing for Responsible Travelers,” I covered a few things you can do before you open up your relationship that’ll make it go a little more smoothly.
I’ve also previously written about best practices for negotiating polyamorous relationship agreements as well as how to manage things if you find that you need to renegotiate your relationship agreement (a very common scenario once the agreement has been “road tested”). » Read more
I enjoy and follow your writings and the recent one about how to know your partner is jealous and not just inventing a concern reminded me that I’ve been trying to find some info on how to deal with it when a partner is jealous.
More specifically, how do I not have anxious and guilty feelings, » Read more
When I opened up a relationship that had been monogamous for 8 years, I was prepared to feel jealous. But what I wasn’t prepared for? The radical shift in my thinking about that relationship. We both became much more autonomous. And it was a large adjustment getting used to our increased autonomy.
Prior to discovering polyamory, » Read more