It’s Tough to Pack Your Ego in Mothballs, But You Might Need to if Your Metamour Is Reluctantly Polyamorous

a brown moth
Image by Hsu Hong Lin / CC BY

A while back, some friends of mine, Margo and Emily, had their first foray into polyamory as a couple. They’d already been sexually open for a little while, having occasional threesomes with another friend (who had an anchor relationship of his own). But neither of them had another ongoing relationship, nor a connection where there were strong romantic emotions.  » Read more

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I’m Waaaaay Pickier About Partner Selection Now That I’m Polyamorous

an orange life raft in pretty bad shape
Image by Rachel Lyra Hospodar / CC BY

As I’ve said many times in the past, I don’t do a lot of online dating. I tend to be unconventional in the way I meet partners these days. I chiefly meet folks incidentally through friends or through friends of friends. But I do participate in online dating every so often (albeit rarely, the last time was for a few weeks several years ago),  » Read more

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In Order to Be Polyamorous, I Had to Get Over the Idea That It’d Make Me a Bad Bisexual

the landscape of a rocky alien planet. The sky is blue, but there are two moons in it.
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

I Kept Having the Same Two Conversations, Over and Over Again

Growing up bisexual, I’d end up in an unpleasant conversation every time I told a new partner my sexual orientation. And it usually went one of the following ways:

Conversation #1: 

Them: Oh, you’re bi? Next thing I know, you’ll be telling me you need to have a boyfriend/girlfriend,  » Read more

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What It’s Like Being Featured in Media Pieces About Polyamory

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Hi Page,

I’ve been reading Poly Land for a while now (first the site and eventually the book). I originally stumbled onto you after you were featured in The Huffington Post in “12 Questions People in Polyamorous Relationships Are Sick of Hearing.” I’ll be honest. I was kind of mad when I saw the article after a friend shared it.  » Read more

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What’s the Worst Thing About Polyamory? Four Takes

it's an illustration of a book that's open on a desk with a scene popping up realistically from its pages. The scene features a dog standing next to a puddle. Birds are flying overhead. One bird is perched on a street lamp. The street lamp is next to a path that a person is walking down. They are wearing a dress and carrying a red umbrella. In the distance a hot air balloon flies. Next to this book scene, on the table, are a coffee mug and a pen, as though this is a writing desk.
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

It’s probably no surprise, but I think polyamory and other forms of consensual non-monogamy can be downright awesome.

That said, every good thing has downsides. For this article, I had conversations with four different folks who are all happily polyamorous asking the following question: What’s the worst thing about polyamory?

Here’s how it went:

Take 1: There’s a Potential For More Let Downs

“Sometimes I feel like dating multiple people is an opportunity to let more people down at once,”  » Read more

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Musicians Who Prefer to Play in Groups Aren’t Considered Selfish, But Lovers Who Prefer Groups Are

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Image by Pixabay / CC 0

I’m sitting with my girlfriend Ro at a jazz club. The band tonight is incredible. They tell us they drove directly to Cleveland from New Orleans, their home base. A 16-hour drive. But listening to them, you’d never know. If this is what rolling off the tour bus and phoning it in sounds like, I can’t imagine what their peak performance would be.  » Read more

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