Selfishness and the Chupacabra

It’s been a year since Skyspook and I reopened our relationship.

And what am I learning, looking back on the past year?

I find more than anything that I’ve grown incredibly selfish.

It’s not that I’m selfish with my love… I love freely, finding myself charmed by and attracted to any number of individuals.  » Read more

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Girl Training

From “Orientation” – originally written 1/30/2011:

Having transitioned from a monogamous marriage almost 2 years ago into a polyamorous one, I’ve been close to a lot more self-identifying bisexual women than I ever had before (really, most of the women I’ve had sex with up until recently considered themselves straight) and had many more female friends who identify as bisexual.  » Read more

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In Plain Sight

In the process of talking to my friend Fluffy about old traumas this evening, it become absolutely clear: much is made of the leering, frothing disgusting rapist, ready and waiting in the shadows to defile.


Looking back, my rapist was incredibly normal — even a bit tedious.

He was a Republican.  » Read more

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A Chameleon is Always a Lizard


Costumes: “…general usage has gradually been replaced by the terms ‘dress’, ‘attire’ or ‘wear’ and usage of ‘costume’ has become more limited to unusual or out-of-date clothing and to attire intended to evoke a change in identity, such as theatrical, Halloween, and mascot costumes.”

It’s that time of year again when I ponder my inclination to arrive at Halloween parties dressed as myself,  » Read more

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“I Wish I Had Your Confidence”

I smoothed down the black silk over my full hips, noting the high slit. Good for movement and enticing without being trashy, I decided. The lace had held up well in storage, those months this slip had spent in a kind of time-out, awaiting a weight loss that would allow it to fit again.  I adjusted the straps and made sure my breasts lined up in a logical way with the bust area.  » Read more

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Skyspook: You say you don’t have strong opinions, but you do.

Me: Oh yeah?

Skyspook: It’s because it’s something you value about yourself , that you’re unopinionated, that you don’t have preferences. Even though you do.



It’s interesting what Fetlife does and doesn’t think is important to announce to one’s friends stream.  » Read more

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Swing and a Miss: Gaslighting, Projection & Introjection

Much has been made recently of gaslighting, and it’s a very important concept to keep track of, boundary policing being of paramount importance especially in those who have multiple relationships. Here’s a good essay on gaslighting:

Briefly: Gaslighting is a form of manipulation in which the target is continually forced to question their own sanity.  » Read more

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