I started watching a new show while Justin was off in Dallas for the weekend, one of the earliest trips he made there, interviewing for a new position. It was a show that had popped up in his Netflix queue as “recommended.” Mostly, I think, because I sometimes watch shows under his user profile instead of remembering to flip it over to mine. » Read more
It’s Frustrating, But You Can’t Rush Your Feelings — and Trying To Can Make Everything Worse
I’m currently prepping for a move from Ohio to Texas. There’s a lot to be done logistically since I have had to prepare my house here for sale — and as quickly as possible.
A lot of friends were really surprised by what I did first. They presumed the very first thing I’d do is pack up the house. » Read more
Do You Have an Emotional Circuit Breaker?
I’m not the kind of person who yells when I’m angry.
I have a long fuse. It takes a lot to get me riled up.
And typically, my first instinct when I’m upset with a partner is simply to talk to them about it. Keeping a level tone of voice but choosing my words carefully. » Read more
Managing a D/s Dynamic When Your Partner Faces Mental Health Challenges
Today’s article is a guest post by Fay Creature.
Fay Creature has been practicing polyamory since 1998 and kink since 2003. She is queer – in sexuality, gender, and her approach to relationships, power exchange, and BDSM.
And check out what she wrote for Poly Land today:
Mental Health and My D/s Dynamics
I believe that BDSM can be very healing, » Read more
The Only Thing My Anxiety Consistently Responds to Is Exhaustion
I’ve been spending a lot of time exhausted lately. Not tired. Not fatigued. But utterly exhausted.
That’s life when your partner accepts their dream job 1000 miles away and you’re unexpectedly trying to prep your house for sale with only about a month to work with. Especially when you throw in other things, » Read more
Be Patient With Yourself. You’re Carrying More Tension Than You Realize.
I’m lying supine on a massage table in a dark room. There’s new age music playing, but not the kind that screams “hey, look at me, I’m new age music.” Instead, it’s the ponderous ambient kind. Music that has a way of combing your mind into straight rows when you’re least expecting it. Helping you work the kinks out. » Read more
Bargains with God, Bargains with the Devil
“Worrying is praying for stuff you don’t want.”
Bargains with God
When I was little, I used to make little bargains with God. Especially on long car rides. I’d ask God to introduce himself in a way that I could understand but nothing so dramatic as to blow his cover or make it so that others wouldn’t have to have faith in order to keep believing in him. » Read more
You’re Only as Sick As Your Secrets
My feelings on 12-step programs are complicated. While some people have gained a ton of personal benefit from them, my own experiences in 12-step programs were considerably more checkered and regrettable. That, coupled with having read extensive research that counters a lot of the core claims of those programs, has generally soured me on them. » Read more
The Ever-Present Threat of Psychological Grief Bacon
There’s a word I learned recently. Kummerspeck. It’s German. Its literal meaning is “grief bacon.”
Figuratively, it’s used to mean the weight you gain from emotional eating.
When it comes to grief bacon, the struggle is real. Don’t I know that.
Because ten years ago, I lost 160 pounds. » Read more
What’s the Difference Between Masochism and Self-Harm?
Hi Page,
I’ve been exploring my more kinky side and I would definitely say I’m a masochist. However, I’ve recently been wondering if I’ve been seeking this out as a new form of self-harm. I used to self-harm in the past and have stopped for a few years, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve just placed the responsibility on someone else. » Read more