9 Steps for Having an Accountability Talk with a Partner When Things Go Wrong

It's a yellow poster board paper. In the center in large letters is the word "Accountability." It also says (moving from top left and moving clockwise): "stay on course," "walk the walk," "reflect and grow," "consequences," "This dog has teeth!" "be real - not fake," "stand and deliver," and "keep your commitments"
Image by United Workers / CC BY

In “Poly Road Testing for Responsible Travelers,” I covered a few things you can do before you open up your relationship that’ll make it go a little more smoothly.

I’ve also previously written about best practices for negotiating polyamorous relationship agreements as well as how to manage things if you find that you need to renegotiate your relationship agreement (a very common scenario once the agreement has been “road tested”).   » Read more

Continue Reading

9 Things Monogamists Can Learn From Polyamory

3 white candy hearts on a white background speckled with with fuschia and navy blue dots
Image by Coralie Ferreira / CC BY

As polyamory increases in popularity and new evidence emerges that non-monogamy can be a viable and satisfying way to conduct relationships, it’s tempting to pit monogamy versus polyamory in a boxing match. However, both relationship styles have benefits. And the best relationships combine aspects of each to form “the best of both worlds.”  » Read more

Continue Reading

7 Common Myths About Being Polyamorous

4 gummy candy hearts dusted with sugar (one red, one yellow, one green, one blue)
Image by Jorge Brazil / CC BY

Polyamory has become much more visible in the last few years. While public acceptance and understanding are increasing, a number of misconceptions still persist about being polyamorous. Here are a few common ones:

1. When you’re polyamorous, you’re always looking for new partners.

No. Just because a person is polyamorous, it doesn’t mean they’re in the market for a new relationship.  » Read more

Continue Reading

5 Imbalances Newly Polyamorous Couples Face and What to Do About Them

a 19th century sri lankan balance scale
Image by Ashley van Haeften / CC BY

When I opened up a relationship that had been monogamous for 8 years, I was prepared to feel jealous. But what I wasn’t prepared for? The radical shift in my thinking about that relationship and the imbalances that came to light with our increased autonomy.

Prior to discovering polyamory, when I had a more traditional marriage,  » Read more

Continue Reading