For Better or Worse, You Don’t Get to Control How Other People See You

a closeup of a pair of glasses
Image by Brett Bolkowy / CC BY

I’m sitting in a pew, attending mass at the church I attended growing up.

It’s been 7 years since I went to a service here, on another visit to my hometown, but surprisingly little has changed since then.

Actually, surprisingly little has changed from 30 years ago, when I was a small child doing my best to remain quiet and tolerate the unending boredom,  » Read more

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I Get Good at Silence Around Certain People, But I Never Have Learned to Enjoy It

image is of text on a white board that reads "redacted" enclosed in brackets
Image by julieindisguise / CC BY

Sometimes people are surprised to learn that I grew up in a rural area in a highly religious family with very traditional conservative ideas of what gender roles should be.

But for me, it’s always there somewhere in my psyche.

Even as I grew up, moved away, and found a social group with different ideas about sex,  » Read more

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If You Leave a Note Before You Go Out, Will They Still Yell At You When You Get Home?

an invisible car in the style of Wonder Woman's invisible jet
Image by Steve Jurvetson / CC BY

It was something I was told a thousand times growing up. If you’re going to go out, leave a note.

By my mother when I was staying at my parents’ house. But not just her and not just there. Everywhere. At all the other places I stayed. Friends’ houses. With other relatives.  » Read more

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I’d Been Dreaming of Home an Awfully Long Time, But I’m Glad It Took a While to Find It

a closeup of a dandelion flower gone to seed
Image by cattan2011 / CC BY

Jealousy is in some measure just and reasonable, since it merely aims at keeping something that belongs to us or we think belongs to us, whereas envy is a frenzy that cannot bear anything that belongs to others.

-Francois de La Rochefoucauld

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I was alone a lot when I was growing up.  » Read more

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