Open Communication Doesn’t Magically Erase the Impact of Major Change

an eraser partially erasing the first two letters of "impossible," transforming it to "possible"
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Today’s piece is a guest blog post from Fluffy, an academic in-training, who is studying organizational behavior in hopes of making the world a better place.

Fluffy is a frequent contributor to Poly Land. Their regular blog is Eclectic Discourse (where pith goes to die; in-depth looks at awkward topics).

Here’s what they wrote for us today:  » Read more

Why Don’t I Communicate More?

Continue Reading

You Can’t Communicate About Something You Don’t Know

it's a blue mute icon
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

Fairly frequently, I’ll write articles describing a relationship situation where something changes, and it puts the people in the relationship into a difficult situation (here’s a recent example).

And invariably, whenever I write one of these pieces, I’ll get a few comments that go a little something like this:

“If everyone knew there were problems,  » Read more

Continue Reading

It’s So Easy to Get Your Own Thoughts & Feelings Mixed Up With Someone Else’s, for Better or Worse

a mop on a wood laminate floor
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

It’s Sunday morning. I’m wearing sweatpants, a T-shirt I don’t care about, and a head wrap that holds my hair out of my face. It’s not glamorous, but it’s functional. I’m dressed that way because I’ve been cleaning. Nothing major but the kind of light cleaning that doesn’t wait for a weekday to be done.  » Read more

Continue Reading

There’s Not Always a Jerk

a set of various shades of grey via overlapping circles
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

As it happens, I was bopping around the Internet the other day, not exactly minding my own business but instead throwing open every door I came across and rifling through for treasures, a bit like a video game protagonist looking for stray gold coins in NPC closets. You know, what people used to call “surfing the web.”  » Read more

Continue Reading

Why It’s Hard to Get Advice When You’re Looking for Validation

an ice cream cone that has been dropped on the ground
Image by Steve Snodgrass / CC BY

After a protracted period of soul searching and agonizing, I decided to share my feelings with him. I thought about how to phrase it. And then I went for it.

And in response he offered, “For one, you feel like that with me, too, and still isn’t true there. For two, not much I could help with except to say that most people like that you’re a bit pushy with your feelings.  » Read more

Continue Reading

Why It Can Be Difficult to Trust People, Even When They Believe What They Say

The worth "truth" with a magnifying glass placed over the U in the word, showing that if you look closer, there are many "lies" underneath
Image by Pixabay / CC 0

The more you know about bias and how deeply it’s entrenched in our brains, the more it becomes truly difficult to trust other people. How they will treat us. If what they say to us is true…

Unfortunately, we’re all capable of saying untrue things, regardless of any moral commitment to truthfulness. Contrary to what a lot of people think,  » Read more

Continue Reading

Good Conversation and Good Communication Are Different Things

a dog holding a purple tennis ball in its mouth
Image by Sadie Hart / CC BY

“I don’t know that we communicate well,” I say to him.

“This is news to me,” he replies.

“Really?”

“Really,” he says. “I love talking to you.”

“I do, too,” I say. “We have good conversations.”

“But you just…”

I sigh. “Just because we have good conversations doesn’t mean that we communicate well.”  » Read more

Continue Reading
1 2 3 8