When We Get Close to People, We Overestimate How Effectively We Communicate With Them

an artist's rendering of two people. One of them is talking out of 2 mouths. Their conversation partner has their eyes closed and a brick wall textured over their face.
Image by Rick&Brenda Beerhorst / CC BY

“We finish each other’s–”

“Sandwiches.”

Arrested Development (and later, Frozen)

*

It’s kind of the best feeling… when you get close enough to a person that you feel like you know what they’re going to say next. When you can actually accurately finish their sentences.  » Read more

Continue Reading

It’s Important to Remember We Don’t Know What We’re Missing

a brick wall with a brick missing
Image by lamdogjunkie / CC BY

Sometimes the Internet seems like Pandora’s box. It’s easier than ever before for disinformation to spread. It makes the early ages of yellow journalism seem quaint in comparison.

But even as I say this, I can’t deny how many benefits it’s simultaneously presented. Online shopping is hard to ignore, how incredibly helpful it is to be able to get practically anything you’d ever want shipped to you…  » Read more

Continue Reading

When One Partner Wants to Have Important Relationship Discussions Via Text & the Other Wants to Have Them in Person

a manhole that says "communication" on it
Image by Alan Levine / CC BY

“I liked your post today on love languages and meeting in the middle,” she says.

“Thanks,” I say.

“Have you written anything on meeting in the middle when one partner wants to talk about issues via text and the other wants to chat about those things in person?”  » Read more

Continue Reading

“I Just Want to Talk About It to Prove to Myself I Can”

a hand holding a ceramic heart, in front of what appears to be a rocky beach-y background
Image by thechallahblog / CC BY

I’ve poured my heart out again. One of those ridiculous long-winded emotional spiels. The kind that leave me exhausted and worried after the fact.

Because it feels cathartic to get it all out, but the last thing I want to do is alienate the person I’m talking to. Overwhelm them. Cause some sort of secondary problem that I’m not in any shape to clean up.  » Read more

Continue Reading

Forgiveness Doesn’t Have to Look Like Forgiveness to the Person You’re Forgiving

abstract black and white digital art; it appears to be a blurry arch
Image by Howard Duncan / CC BY

forgive (verb) – to stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake

*

As I mentioned in another recent post, people tend to have a very expansive notion of forgiveness. They’ll often act as though forgiving someone means that you forgot what they did or that you allow your relationship with them to be exactly as it was before.  » Read more

Continue Reading

Is It Really Interrupting… Or Is It Cooperative Overlap?

two chat bubbles that are overlapping, a green one on the left and an orange one on the right
Image by Valery Kenski / CC BY

Interrupting. Ahhh… now, there’s a loaded topic.

I shudder involuntarily whenever the subject is broached. Not because I worry about getting interrupted. I don’t.

I have the other sort of baggage — where I worry I’m going to anger someone because I’ve inadvertently interrupted them.

What’s interesting is that I haven’t universally gotten this feedback from everyone I’ve known or anything.  » Read more

Continue Reading
1 2 3 10