Dear God Is Monogamy Easier When You Stop Shaming Yourself for Crushes

a bunch of stick figure seeming dolls, all happy, moving in a crowd
Image by Alexandre Delbos / CC BY

“I have to thank you for me having sanity,” my monogamous friend Gull says.

“Ooooo,” I say. I lean forward in my chair. This sounds like it’s gonna be good.

“So okay, I’ve been talking to this dude for about six months,” she says. “And the friendship kind of got thrown into close friendship quickly due to stupid stuff from external drama.”  » Read more

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Polyamory Doesn’t Actually Need to Be Easy to Be Something Worth Pursuing

a photograph of a sunrise over the Alps
Image by AirHaake / CC BY

There are some people who say that polyamory is objectively way easier than monogamy (or, the less far less commonly used term monamory, the desire or practice of having a single intimate relationship at a time, which is perhaps a more accurate opposite).

They insist that polyamory more closely mimics our natural state or that it’s simply easier to manage.  » Read more

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Reasons Why 5 Ambiamorous People Are Functionally Monogamous…At Least For Now

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Image by Diego A / CC BY

Often people view monogamy and polyamory as being polar opposites. Some even take the view that monogamy and polyamory aren’t relationship styles but innate relationship orientations, diametrically opposed ones at that, with no overlap. In this view, you’re either mono or poly. And there’s nothing in between.

Setting aside the nitpicky issue that the more proper linguistic pairs re: opposites would be monogamy/polygamy and polyamory/monamory,  » Read more

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To Make Mono/Poly Easier, View Monogamy and Polyamory as a Spectrum, Not a Binary

A venn diagram up above a cityscape. One of the circles says "yes," the other says "no." The overlap between the two is labeled "me."
Image by Terminals & Gates / CC BY

Mono/poly relationships (i.e., pairings in which one partner is monogamous and the other is polyamorous) are famously difficult.

While there are many factors, we do ourselves no favors by viewing monogamy and polyamory as polar opposites rather than as points on the same spectrum.

Consider this: It’s difficult to find a workable middle between two things if you’re convinced that one can’t possibly exist.  » Read more

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